


Tell the gays on the third floor to calm down

by disaster_top



Series: toh fics that i wrote on impulse [3]
Category: The Owl House (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Body Dysphoria, Chatting & Messaging, Established Relationship, F/F, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Friends to Lovers, GAYASS, Gay Disaster Amity Blight, Gen, Gender Dysphoria, Implied Sexual Content, Misgendering, Multi, Muslim Character, Oblivious Luz Noceda, Polyamory, References to Drugs, Slow Burn, Someone help this gay child, Trans Character, aha mentions of suicide, amity being the dumb simp that they are, amity is a he/they lesbian bc im one nd im projecting, amity is so dumb, amity is very gay, at some point, bc yES, boscha is my spirit animal, but i aint snitching, deadass, for the vinera, fukery, groupchat, i hate the tag but too many of the jokes r somewhat sexual here i guess, idk - Freeform, is that the ship name?, its gonna be a long ride bois, luz is the new kid on the floor, mentions of transphobia, obviously, platonic dating is a thing now, so apparently theres angst now, some things i put here might be based on tru events, someone pls help him, theyre all in college, this whole fic was sponsored by gay panik, trans boscha, viney is non-binary bc i said so, w e e d
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-30
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:08:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 25
Words: 29,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27283933
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/disaster_top/pseuds/disaster_top
Summary: simp: im gonna kill u just u waitfidget spinner: willow will protec mebest girl: no i wont----------Or, amity is a simp, luz is too nice for her own good, boscha needs to stop touching what isn't hers and the others are just along for the ride
Relationships: Amity Blight/Luz Noceda, Boscha/Skara (The Owl House), Boscha/Willow Park, Boscha/Willow Park/Skara, Emira Blight/Viney, Willow Park/Skara, didnt expect that did u
Series: toh fics that i wrote on impulse [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1983473
Comments: 259
Kudos: 947





	1. Boscha what did you do?

**[8:28 am]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

gay: boscha where the fuck did all the cereal go?

fidget spinner: i plead the fifth

gay: boscha no

gay: where is

gay: the fucking

gay: cereal?

fidget spinner: i consume

gay: ill kill you

skarapace: can we not threaten murder this early in the mornin?

fidget spinner: tell that to amity

gay: you shouldnt have eaten all the damn cereal

fidget spinner: well maybe u shouldnt have bought three bags nd then not touched them for a whole week

gay: well maybe you shouldnt have eATEN all of them in one nIGHT

fidget spinner: bitch i was doin math hw nd u know how hongry i get while doin hw :/

gay: boscha you know that i always have cereal in the morning before going to class

fidget spinner: sucks to suck am

gay: boscha ur about to take a shower right?

fidget spinner: ye why

fidget spinner: waIT NO

fidget spinner: DONT U DARE BINCH

skarapace: wtf

best girl: why can i hear screaming from down the hall?

skarapace: that would be amity murdering boscha

best girl: can she not? Im doing a project with boscha already

skarapace: too bad, shes about to die

best girl: ugh

best girl: can u tell amity not to kill her

skarapace: maybe

skarapace: arent u gettin a new kid in ur dorm room?

best girl: yeah she came over an hour ago nd moved in

best girl: shes actually rly nice

skarapace: she taken?

best girl: skara

best girl: no

best girl: bad

skarapace: m just joking lmao

skarapace: im trynna ignore the death battle happening in the bathroom ( ._.)

best girl: well u could go nd stop them

skarapace: i don wanna

skarapace: i have a lecture at 10 so imma sleep rn

best girl: i always appreciate ur enthusiasm skara

skarapace: i aim to please

smol boi: can i ask why i just saw boscha running down the hall in nothing but a towel with amity chasing after her with a wooden spoon?

best girl: a

best girl: towel?

smol boi: yes

skarapace: okay ye im turnin in for a nap

skarapace: peace

Panic! at the gender: wtf guys

Panic! at the gender: em nd i r trynna sleep

best girl: well excuse us viney but this is boscha’s fault

Panic! at the gender: ah

Panic! at the gender: wat did our resident fidget spinner do now?

best girl: ate all of amity’s cereal

Panic! at the gender: a mortal crime around this floor, send her to the gulag

best girl: yes amity is already making her pay

fidget spinner: okay im fine

fidget spinner: im fine

Panic! at the gender: how did u escape?

fidget spinner: i steered amity towards a pretty girl nd left her in my dust when that gay dumbass froze bc she saw a female specimen

Panic! at the gender: sounds like her tbh

Panic! at the gender: emira is cackling

best girl: i dont doubt it

fidget spinner: hah am knocked into the girl nd made her drop her boxes

fidget spinner: fuckiing dumbass

Panic! at the gender: need i remind u of wat happened when u first met willow?

fidget spinner: no thanks im good

best girl: boscha please go and help amity

fidget spinner: no, shes helpin the girl nd blusin

fidget spinner: imma leave her in her gayness

smol boi: well, shes helping the new girl so thats nice of her

best girl: i didnt know amity could lift that many boxes in one go

fidget spinner: the power of gay gave her strength

best girl: ah

best girl: ive never seen amity this red

Panic! at the gender: the gay is strong in that one

best girl: clearly

best girl: she just brought in like five boxes without breaking a sweat but she looks like shes about to pass out with how red she is

smol boi: the new girl seems happy tho

smol boi: shes talking to amity

Panic! at the gender: are u two just watching them talk while ur on ur phones?

best girl: basically

best girl: actually boscha can u meet me in the band room? I want to finish this project as quickly as i can

fidget spinner: sure

best girl: boSCHA WTF

Panic! at the gender: wat happened?

best girl: boscha just assaulted me

Panic! at the gender: she wHAT?

smol boi: boscha entered our dorm room and threw willow over her shoulder then left

Panic! at the gender: okay good

Panic! at the gender: i thought i was gonna have to make some heads roll nd im rly comfy rn

skarapace: ye cause im sure emira’s boobs r comfy smh

Panic! at the gender: shut tf up

smol boi: amity has left the premise

ededdndeddy: tell her to go by my dorm nd gimme my hw

Panic! at the gender: what did u do to make her willingly do ur hw?

ededdndeddy: i scored her a date with a friend

Panic! at the gender: how did it end?

ededdndeddy: mittens gay paniked nd left

Panic! at the gender: woop there it is

gay: where the fuk is boscha?

Panic! at the gender: harassing willow

gay: so nothing new?

**[fidget spinner changed gay to simp]**

simp: very funny boscha

**[fidget spinner added Luz Noceda to {The gays of the third floor}]**

simp: boSCHA

fidget spinner: bye binch

simp: im gonna kill u just u wait

fidget spinner: willow will protec me

best girl: no i wont

fidget spinner: fuk

simp: im coming for your shins boscha

Panic! at the gender: great, now stop spamming the chat and either go to sleep or go to class

ededdndeddy: never a dull moment on this floor huh?

Panic! at the gender: shut up nd let me sleep

ededdndeddy: rip me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> boom another fic :D
> 
> i do take suggestions if there r any situations u want the gang to go through nd feel free to feed me with kudos nd comments


	2. stop stop she's already gay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fidget spinner: WHOS FLOWERS GF
> 
> fidget spinner: ILL FIST FIGHT THEM
> 
> best girl: huh?

**[10:12 am]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

skarapace: the teacher is playin istg

fidget spinner: do tell

skarapace: he started the lecture nd then just fukin

skarapace: left?

fidget spinner: mood

Panic! at the gender: didnt am kill u?

fidget spinner: im stronk

simp: not for long

best girl: can u two pls stop? Im trying to pay attention

fidget spinner: sounds like a u problem cutie

Luz Noceda: o are u two dating?

best girl: hhKJDLSFGAUKDJL NO

fidget spinner: why would i date a loser like flowers? Who do u think i am?

Luz Noceda: idk u argue like an old married couple

simp: boom

**[Luz Noceda changed their name to badboi]**

badboi: also, hi everyone im luz :DD

best girl: welcome to this chaos luz

Panic! at the gender: sup im viney

fidget spinner: boscha

ededdndeddy: edric

cantseeme: emira

best girl: nd u already know me amity nd gus

smol boi: hi luz :)

simp: hello luz

badboi: nice to meet u all :D

fidget spinner: ye im sure amity is glad she met u

**[{gay dumbasses}]**

straight hair: boSCHA WAT THE FULSDFKJHS

eye am gay: chill m just settin up the ground work for u

straight hair: sTOP

eye am gay: suddenly im jared 19

straight hair: boscha

straight hair: no

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

badboi: im glad i met her too, she rly helped me yesterday

simp: ghkdfsjala

fidget spinner: welp, i have a test to take so peace

cantseeme: mhm

Panic! at the gender: dont u have a test too?

cantseeme: not if i dont go to it

Panic! at the gender: emira

Panic! at the gender: go

cantseeme: fine

ededdndeddy: whipped

cantseeme: shut

best girl: boscha

best girl: i dont want to sound patronizing but someone is using ur guitar

fidget spinner: ill gut them

Panic! at the gender: boscha no

ededdndeddy: boscha yes

cantseeme: boscha yes

best girl: boscha

best girl: no

fidget spinner: ugh fine

badboi: r u sure ur not dating?

fidget spinner: positive

fidget spinner: even the thought is just *vomits in arabic*

best girl: okay then boscha i didnt know i was that repulsive to u

fidget spinner: wait no

fidget spinner: ur not repulsive flowers

fidget spinner: its just the thought

fidget spinner: cause u kissed amity once

fidget spinner: itd be like i indirectly kissed her nd thats blegh cause shes like my annoying little sis

best girl: uh that happened ages ago

fidget spinner: still

simp: can i ask why we’re bringing that up?

fidget spinner: cause i want to embarrass u

fidget spinner: like having willow as ur first crush? Cmon am

simp: shut

best girl: all im gonna say is

best girl: amity is an amazing kisser

simp: sTOPNJFDBHKSLA

fidget spinner: :/

badboi: o///o

best girl: luz wh-

Panic! at the gender: guys wtf

fidget spinner: i think willow still has an affect on amity

simp: sdhfgghdfjHDFKJLS NO

badboi: wait so is this a poly thing?

simp: HKDJGFSYHUAILJFUGHDJ

fidget spinner: lmao they wished

best girl: no we’re all friends

best girl: only emira and viney are dating

badboi: interesting

simp: wDYM INTERESTINGBFHGDYUKHSAJL

Panic! at the gender: can u all stop raising amity’s blood pressure?

Panic! at the gender: em needs her to be the maid of honor for our wedding

ededdndeddy: wat about me :(

Panic! at the gender: u can be the flower girl

ededdndeddy: yay :DD

fidget spinner: great, can i be the one u sacrifice before the ceremony?

Panic! at the gender: yes

fidget spinner: nice

best girl: no offence but wat?

fidget spinner: i am sacrifice

best girl: i

best girl: okay?

simp: can u all please shut up?

fidget spinner: suddenly im jared 19

simp: no stop

badboi: um, does anyone know where the art room is? Im a little lost

simp: ill help u

fidget spinner: simp

ededdndeddy: simp

cantseeme: simp

simp: shut

fidget spinner: yall hear smth?

simp: boscha

fidget spinner: guess not

fidget spinner: maybe ill fuk around nd

simp: boscha no

fidget spinner: watch some porn on a certain simps computer that she so stupidly left open on her bed

simp: boSCHA NO

fidget spinner: i know that u have that authentic lesbian porn so peace

simp: BOSCHA NO STOP

skarapace: isnt she in class? How tf is she gonna watch porn?

ededdndeddy: she skippin

ededdndeddy: for porn

Panic! at the gender: i mean

Panic! at the gender: would u rather watch porn or do math?

simp: its ace week stop being horny or ill send u to horny jail

ededdndeddy: says the ace with lesbian porn on their computer?

simp: the word is demi edric

badboi: o ur demi :D

simp: yes

badboi: neat

fidget spinner: damn am

fidget spinner: for an ace u have some wack things on here

simp: sTOP

fidget spinner: then pls explain why u have ‘furry’ in ur search history?

simp: I didn't? look that up?

fidget spinner: u sure?

ededdndeddy: o that was me not am

fidget spinner: i-

ededdndeddy: dont ask

fidget spinner: this is pretty standart for u tho so idk

cantseeme: kinkshame

ededdndeddy: no

cantseeme: but its my kink

Panic! at the gender: okay stop ur scaring the new girl

badboi: nah this is fun

ededdndeddy: shes learnin

skarapace: hello ppl

skarapace: shut up pls

fidget spinner: ur not the boss of me

best girl: stop

fidget spinner: okay

skarapace: i-

badboi: r u sure u two arent dating?

fidget spinner: yes im fukin sure

simp: boscha pls leave my computer alone

fidget spinner: no i found a section of good lesbian porn nd im gonna watch it

simp: boscha no

best girl: boscha no

fidget spinner: fine

badboi: im-

fidget spinner: istg if u ask if we’re dating one more time ill slap u with a wet moldy fish

best girl: boscha no

best girl: apologize

fidget spinner: ugh

fidget spinner: sry

fidget spinner: now back to the porn

simp: boschA NO

skarapace: arent u supposed to help luz to her class?

simp: yes im walking with her

skarapace: gay

simp: shut

skarapace: :P

**[2:12 pm]**

ededdndeddy: okay so

ededdndeddy: boscha just accidentally set fire to the stove nd we need back up

simp: she fuCKING WHTA

fidget spinner: arson go brr

simp: IM GONNA FUKIN-

fidget spinner: am hiding on the roof

fidget spinner: u cant catch me

cantseeme: doesnt tellin mittens where u are defeat the purpose of hiding?

fidget spinner: oop

simp: i will hunt you down

fidget spinner: rip me

fidget spinner: ed u can have my wynonna earp funko pop, skara u get my computer, flowers u can have my heart nd vin u can choke

Panic! at the gender: thank u

badboi: r u sure willow nd boscha arent dating?

Panic! at the gender: i think they’re unknowingly in a committed relationship

badboi: too bad boscha is gonna die

Panic! at the gender: willow is gonna be a widow soon

Panic! at the gender: rip

**[3:23 pm]**

fidget spinner: iM STILL ALIVE BINCHES

simp: not for long

fidget spinner: o no

badboi: think of how willow is gonna feel

badboi: shes gonna have to mourn her gf twice

fidget spinner: her wHAT

simp: die

skarapace: stop stop shes already dead

fidget spinner: WHOS FLOWERS GF

fidget spinner: ILL FIST FIGHT THEM

best girl: huh?

Panic! at the gender: its u bosch

fidget spinner: gjhdfskal

ededdndeddy: stop shes already gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> rip boscha


	3. Who touched the fucking paint?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fidget spinner: the simps opinion isnt valid
> 
> simp: shut up

**[3:28 pm]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

Panic! at the gender: hey guys where did the paint that i left infront of the door go?

fidget spinner: o u mean the bucket of paint thats just laying in the stairs?

Panic! at the gender: i guess so :/

Panic! at the gender: is it dark green paint?

fidget spinner: uh, no its more light green

Panic! at the gender: rly? Wat does the bucket look like?

fidget spinner: idk dude its like grey nd has a non-binary flag on it

fidget spinner: very pretty btw

Panic! at the gender: thanks, but that means that someone tampered with my paint

fidget spinner: not it

Panic! At the gender: @everyone did yall touch my paint?

cantseeme: define paint

simp: emira no

fidget spinner: emira yes

best girl: i didnt touch the paint viney, but i saw boscha hanging around the hallway earlier

fidget spinner: ur lucky ur cute flowers

fidget spinner: i didnt do shit to the paint color

simp: how do u know that its the paint color that changed?

fidget spinner: because i fuking saw it

simp: mhm

ededdndeddy: id like to point out that i saw mittens enter the art room earlier

simp: yes because i had art earlier today and needed to get my supplies

ededdndeddy: sus

simp: well weren’t u the one who wanted to mess with emira nd viney earlier?

ededdndeddy: irrelevant

smol boi: um, i did it viney dont worry about it

Panic! at the gender: it wasnt u gus uve been down in tech all day

Panic! at the gender: who messed with my paint?

fidget spinner: i dont wanna be that binch but luz has been real quiet

simp: hoW DARE YOU ACCUSE HER

badboi: hmm? Oh i didnt touch the paint

fidget spinner: sus

simp: boscha leave her alone, if luz said she didnt do it then she didnt do it

badboi: aww thanks amity

simp: hdkfjsla

fidget spinner: the simps opinion isnt valid

simp: shut up

Panic! at the gender: rly guys?

ededdndeddy: hey vin

ededdndeddy: em has been kind of quiet too

cantseeme: why would i destroy my partners paint? For wat?

ededdndeddy: everyone is a sUSPECT EMIRA

cantseeme: fair

badboi: um, wheres skara?

fidget spinner: that bitch

skarapace: guys

skarapace: i know who did it

badboi: who?

skarapace: he-man

simp: who?

ededdndeddy: ooo he-man

cantseeme: who?

fidget spinner: who the fuk is that?

ededdndeddy: i-

ededdndeddy: he-man?

ededdndeddy: master of the universe?

badboi: oooo gay robin hood

fidget spinner: oooo

ededdndeddy: i-

Panic! at the gender: stop fuking around

Panic! at the gender: who tf messed with my paint?

fidget spinner: i say that it was ed

ededdndeddy: whAT?! NO WAY

fidget spinner: tHEN WHY WERE U SOOOOO QUICK TO BLAME EMIRA?

ededdndeddy: BC SHES SUS AS FUK

cantseeme: NO IM NOT

simp: can we pls be rational about this?

ededdndeddy: O SHUT UP U FUKING GAY DISASTER

simp: EDRIC YOU BETTER RUN WHILE YOU STILL CAN

ededdndeddy: TRY ME BINCH

fidget spinner: MEET OUTSIDE THE DORM IN FIVE MIN WE’RE GONNA GO TO THE PARK ND FIGHT IT OUT

cantseeme: BE THERE OR BE SQUARE BINCH

simp: iM GONNA DESTROY UR ENTIRE BLOODLINE

ededdndeddy: GUESS ITS A GOOD THING IM GAY AS FUK THEN CAUSE I DONT HAVE A BLOODLINE MITTENS

fidget spinner: IF ANY OF U LOSERS CHECK OUT IM GONNA HUNT U DOWN

best girl: i have things to do so i wont be coming

fidget spinner: understandable have a nice deay flowers nd also i watered ur weird plant thing earlier so u dont need to do it

best girl: thank you boscha

badboi: uh? Im? Confused?

simp: u didnt do anything wrong luz so dont worry

Panic! at the gender: willow, gus nd luz didnt do shit so theyre exemped from the fight

ededdndeddy: fair

fidget spinner: OKAY EMIRA SHOWED UP, AM ED WHERE THE FUK R U GUYS

simp: im coming

badboi: wait amity i need to give u smth

simp: of course luz

cantseeme: simp

simp: shut

fidget spinner: just hurry ur ass up am

**[4:01 pm]**

**[{gays who suck at math}]**

Thing 1: aight im here

Thing 2: wheres mittens?

flower pot: hmm i think you might have a problem

Thing 2: huh?

flower pot: luz

flower pot: whats the word?

flower pot: sent amity into a gay panic attack

A StAR: i-

Thing 2: wow

hook: a legend

Thing 1: okay but wat did luz even do?

flower pot: gave her a kiss on the cheek

flower pot: for ‘good luck’

A StAR: wow

A StAR: can i get a kiss too flowers?

flower pot: no

Thing 1: get rekt

hook: lmao rip boscha

flower pot: later

Thing 2: oop *eyes*

Thing 1: i-

hook: damn

hook: any comment boscha?

Thing 1: i think she stopped functioning

A StAR: lets go binches im gonna win this fight nd get a kiss from flowers

flower pot: a cheek kiss

A StAR: woOOOOO LETS GO

hook: welp

hook: gl babe

Thing 2: thx cutie

Thing 2: im gonna win this thing for u

Thing 1: in ur dreams

A StAR: okay am is in the car cmon lets go

A StAR: to the park we go

hook: wow

hook: this’ll def end well

flower pot: wait what are they fighting over again?

hook: i have no idea :’)

flower pot: ah

flower pot: this is a disaster

**[5:49 am]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

skarapace: guys wtf happened?

badboi: yea who won?

cantseeme: huh?

skarapace: ur fight?

ededdndeddy: oo

ededdndeddy: nah we stopped at baskin robbins nd got ice cream

fidget spinner: tis very good

simp: i agree

best girl: okay but then who messed with the paint?

Panic! at the gender: who knows

best girl: i-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeeee
> 
> pls feed me with comments nd kudos nd I hope u enjoyed this chap


	4. Platonic gf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> skarapace: wh-what did I just witness
> 
> ededdndeddy: the bare essentials of their relationship

**[7:49 am]**

**[{o wow, sports}]**

soldja boi: can someone pls come kill me? Thanks

boutta nae nae: wat brought that on?

soldja boi: flowers tests embarrassed myself

diana but make it gayer: get over here boscha ill kill you

soldja boi: ur a real one blight

soldja boi: skara can go fuk herself tho

boutta nae nae: love ya too bosch

boutta nae nae: can u explain wat happened tho?

boutta nae nae: like im so confused

soldja boi: ameRIGA EXBLAIN

diana but make it gayer: EXBLAIN WADDYU MEAN ARKANSAW WAT DO YOU-

boutta nae nae: i hate u all so much rn

soldja boi: bold words coming from someone whos user is ‘boutta n a e n a e’

boutta nae nae: yesh tis my calling

diana but make it gayer: but seriously boscha what happened?

soldja boi: dont wanna talk about it

WAP: she asked willow to be her gf

soldja boi: bINCH

WAPx2: then when willow said wat she responded with ‘wat?’

WAPx2: nd willow was like ‘u just asked to be my gf?’

WAP: so then this genius

WAPx2: this absolute motherfuking smart boi

WAP: said

WAPx2: ‘o i meant platonically’

boutta nae nae: …

boutta nae nae: ur entering solid amity territory bosch i hope ur aware of that

soldja boi: bdjshgkayHUIRFJLS

diana but make it gayer: i take offense

WAPx2: good

boutta nae nae: okay but like

boutta nae nae: wat did she say?

soldja boi: dksjflkiokldsaf

WAP: willow asked how a gf could be platonic nd boscha was just like ‘its a platonic gf’

WAPx2: the pinochle of explanations folks

diana but make it gayer: okay but wat happened then?

WAP: idk willow just seemed so confused cause she had no idea wat a platonic gf was

diana but make it gayer: well wat is a platonic gf?

boutta nae nae: u nd luz

diana but make it gayer: nsdbhjfgkyuahfgyhi

boutta nae nae: mhm

WAP: idk man if u have a platonic gf its usually when both ppl like eachother but their too much of cowards to confess for real for real so they just say ‘its toTALLY PLATONIC’ when in reality its not. platonic. at all

soldja boi: heh flowers doesnt like me like that guys

soldja boi: shes too good for me

WAP: ...

WAPx2: …

boutta nae nae: ...

diana but make it gayer: …

boutta nae nae: i fukin hate it here

soldja boi: wha-

WAP: bitch

WAP: shoor ur shot

WAPx2: dont be a pussy

soldja boi: i-

diana but make it gayer: why dont you invite her over to do math

soldja boi: math?

WAP: ye

WAP: mATH

WAPx2: add the bed

boutta nae nae: subtract the clothes

WAP: divide the legs

boutta nae nae: and mulTIPLY :DD

soldja boi: …

diana but make it gayer: …

WAP: :D

WAPx2: :D

boutta nae nae: :D

soldja boi: i fukin hate it here

soldja boi: can i get uuuuh

soldja boi: chair

soldja boi: but make it

soldja boi:  ✨ electric ✨

diana but make it gayer: i mean, you cOULD multiply with her, in a bed, with no clothes

soldja boi: …

soldja boi: ye no bye bitches

WAP: think she gonna do it?

boutta nae nae: nah lmao

**[8:30 am]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

best girl: so im currently watching boscha and amity trying and failing to load the dishwasher

best girl: are they okay?

ededdndeddy: lol how many lesbians does it take to load a dishwasher?

badboi: idk honestly

badboi: they just broke like three plate

skarapace: oof

cantseeme: who let mittens get close to any of the appliances? Ill skin them alive

ededdndeddy: oop

Panic! at the gender: em no

cantseeme: ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ

Panic! at the gender: this is serious

cantseeme: ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ

Panic! at the gender: fine

Panic! at the gender: ᕕ( ಠ_ಠ)ᕗ

skarapace: wh-what did I just witness

ededdndeddy: the bare essentials of their relationship

simp: okay so

simp: we may have broken a lot

Panic! at the gender: im not paying for new utensils

simp: fair

fidget spinner: okay so we may have also broken the dishwasher?

fidget spinner: like bubbles keeps coming out of it nd like? I think its defective

best girl: wHAT?

fidget spinner: oops?

best girl: Whoops? WHOOPS? This is not a “whoops” situation boscha we are far past whoops whoops is a distant speck in the rearview mirror we are solidly in “oh fuck” territory and I expect you to act like it

best girl: can you be serious for five minutes?

fidget spinner: my personal record is two minutes and twenty-nine seconds and that was only because I was crying for half of that time

badboi: boscha, are you okay?

fidget spinner: no

best girl: im sorry boscha

fidget spinner: its fine flowers, ill pay for a new dishwasher if its broken

best girl: thank you

best girl: and about what you asked me earlier today

fidget spinner: u dont need to answer willow i was stupid to even ask that

fidget spinner: i mean, im not smart like you, im not caring like you all i do is tackle ppl during rugby games and thats it

fidget spinner: i practically have nothing going for me

best girl: boscha

fidget spinner: hmm?

best girl: meet me in the library right now

fidget spinner: but why?

fidget spinner: why would u even wanna be with me rn

best girl: boscha

best girl: now

fidget spinner: yes ma’am

skarapace:  👀

badboi:  👀

ededdndeddy:  👀

cantseeme:  👀

simp: well gl boscha i guess

cantseeme: that bitch is gonna need more than luck but go off i guess

simp: wait did she take her pills earlier?

cantseeme: wait shit

ededdndeddy: should we rly interrupt them?

simp: i guess not

Panic! at the gender: fine but as soon as she comes back we’re shoving that shit down her throat

ededdndeddy: graphic truly

ededdndeddy: welp there's nothin we can do now

badboi: hey amity! Wanna come with me to the pool? Its free :D

simp: yea sure

cantseeme: why r u bein so calm mittens? Usually u would be panikin

simp: contrary to popular opinion i do not constantly panic when a girl is near me

cantseeme: ye sure okay casanova

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end is brought to u by me who actually got scolded five times today cause i forgot my meds :’)


	5. Weed my dude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> cantseeme: dont talk to my partner like that bitch
> 
> fidget spinner: square up u gay salad

**[11:28 am]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

skarapace: well now that we know that the dishwasher is totaled

fidget spinner: fuk off

skarapace: no

skarapace: anygays

skarapace: can someone cook smth?

ededdndeddy: why cant ya cook smth for urself

skarapace: hw

cantseeme: aight have fun i guess

cantseeme: me nd vin r gonna chill

fidget spinner: is that a euphemism or am i having a fukin stroke?

simp: boscha no

fidget spinner: party pooper

simp: mature

cantseeme: no its not a euphemism bosch

fidget spinner: ooooo so ur gonna get lit?

cantseeme: lit as fuk ;)

fidget spinner: noice i wanna join

best girl: boscha no

best girl: we have work to do

cantseeme: work?

ededdndeddy: woRK?

Panic! at the gender: care to elaborate?

fidget spinner: fuk off binch

Panic! at the gender: i am hurt

fidget spinner: good

cantseeme: dont talk to my partner like that bitch

fidget spinner: square up u gay salad

badboi: gaY SALAD?

badboi: IM WHEEZING

fidget spinner: as u should

badboi: bhjkfdslk

simp: boscha stop

fidget spinner: no

**[12:00 am]**

**[{gays who suck at math}]**

**[Thing 2 changed the chat name to {mittens has a crush haha}]**

straight hair: boscha willow what happened between you two?

eye am gay: nothing

**[Thing 2 changed their name to Certified mittens bullier]**

Certified mittens bullier: i hate viney

eye am gay: no u dont

eye am gay: u good?

Certified mittens bullier: no

straight hair: eMIRA WHY DID YOU THROW MY HOODIE OUT THE WINDOW?

eye am gay: the one that u let luz borrow yesterday?

straight hair: YES

eye am gay: ah

straight hair: EMIRA WHY

Certified mittens bullier: bc viney is being hot

flower pot: really? Thats why you yeeted amity’s hoodie and why you’re yelling at boscha? Because viney is doing their whole ‘am I a boy or a girl? who knows but everyone likes me so that makes everyone gay’ thing

Certified mittens bullier: ...Fuck u willow, u would know

flower pot: huh?

Certified mittens bullier: literally everyone who ever talks to boscha gets a crush on her no cap

eye am gay: I banish u to the Gulag

flower pot: huh?

Certified mittens bullier: u know im right all the little freshmen at uni that boscha would help 110% had a crush on her

Thing 1: and I fucking oop-

straight hair: shut up ed

eye am gay: they did?

Certified mittens bullier: just because u had a mean streak doesn’t change the fact that ur hot nd a dumb oblivious gay mess

eye am gay: rude but ok

Thing 1: aight but seriously bosch u wouldn’t know if someone was pinning for u if they slapped u in the face with a wet feral ferret

Certified mittens bullier: graphic

eye am gay: idk, I’m not really that good looking and I’m mean

flower pot: …

eye am gay: ?

Certified mittens bullier: i fukin hate it here

eye am gay: huh?

Thing 1: boscha

Thing 1: some ppl r into that

eye am gay: i-

eye am gay: huh?

Thing 1: u fukin dumbass

Certified mittens bullier: u watch porn no? Im sure ur aware that ppl get off to bullying

eye am gay: im gonna

eye am gay: ignore that

Certified mittens bullier: :/

flower pot: uh

hook: hey i made spaghetti

Certified mittens bullier: i love u thank u so much babe

hook: ur welcome

eye am gay: gonna go get that spaGHET

straight hair: wait no i want some

eye am gay: u snooze u lose simp

straight hair: not if i get there first

eye am gay: i go zoom zoom binch

**[fidget spinner and straight hair went idle]**

Certified mittens bullier: i am in fear

hook: eeeeem

Certified mittens bullier: yes babe

hook: do u have the weed?

Certified mittens bullier: ed you got the weed right

Thing 1: its in the drawer behind the sink

Certified mittens bullier: aigh

Certified mittens bullier: ed this is oregano

Certified mittens bullier: WHERE IS OUR WEED EDRIC

Thing 1: i dont know binch i left it there

hook: wait

hook: i used oregano to make the spaghetti

Thing 1: …

Certified mittens bullier: …

hook: o fuk

**[12:42 am]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

fidget spinner: weeeee

fidget spinner: i can feel my eyelashes guys

cantseeme: well thats not good

simp: luuuuuuz

badboi: yes amity?

simp: i love you

ededdndeddy: mitTENS WTFYSDGHUJAILK

badboi: aww i love you too ami

simp: yeeeee

smol boi: well this is quite a predicament

best girl: truly

best girl: what even happened

Panic! at the gender: well long story short i accidentally put weed in the spaghetti instead of oregano and boscha and amity had a contest on who could eat the most and now they’re both high as a fukin kite

best girl: …

badboi: ami do you want cuddles?

simp: yes pls

badboi: alright lets go to the library and u can lay down as i read u books

simp: weEEEEEEEE ill be there in a flash luz

cantseeme: there r dm’s for a reason smh

Panic! at the gender: well heres the thing

Panic! at the gender: was the spaghetti good

fidget spinner: yesh very

best girl: guys if ur rly high can you please drink water? Its only boscha and amity who had it right?

cantseeme: well u see

cantseeme: matt, skara nd skye had some of the spaghetti so

best girl: …

best girl: they had wHAT??!?

fidget spinner: YOU KNOW WHAT? i like how we all do a good job in this

best girl: what? What do u possibly do a good job in?

fidget spinner: on stressing willow she is cute when shes stressed

best girl: …

best girl: thats it im coming for your ass

fidget spinner: my ass?

ededdndeddy: first of all what ass?

fidget spinner: binch i wil have u know that i kave an amasinf ass

fidget spinner: i ain t no whyte bitch with a flat ass

ededdndeddy: listen when ur being talked about em

cantseeme: fuk off we’re only half white

Panic! at the gender: imagine being white

Panic! at the gender: couldnt be me

cantseeme: …

ededdndeddy: viney ut the only person here who’s yt no

Panic! at the gender thats the fuking joke :’)

smol boi: but you arent white

Panic! at the gender: im not?

cantseeme: babe ur asian ofc ur not white

Panic! at the gender: o

best girl: so what you’re trying to say is that no one in the chat is white except for emira, edric and amity but they’re only half white?

cantseeme: yesh

ededdndeddy: u know, ive known yall for years but i dont remember ever asking wher yall come from

cantseeme: y a l l

ededdndeddy: shut

fidget spinner: weeeeee

fidget spinner: m gonna light my hair on fire

best girl: boSCHA NO

cantseeme: I THOUGHT UR RELIGION SAID THAT YOU WERENT ALLOWED TO GET HIGH

ededdndeddy: fuking bitch

fidget spinner: i didnt do it on purpos

Panic! at the gender: ye i guess that earns u a pass :/

fidget spinner: weeee

best girl: boscha

fidget spinner: yeeees cutie :DD

best girl: …

best girl: boscha im not gonna answer since i know that u are not in a stable mindeset

fidget spinner: aww

best girl: can someone pls go throw away that spaghetti

badboi: spaghet i sogod

cantseeme: gOD?

badboi: *goof

badboi: *good

ededdndeddy: oop

best girl: luz

best girl: pls tell me u didnt have any

badboi: i tried som

badboi: nds now me dn ami ar napin so shhhh

fidget spinner: willow i wwanna nap too

best girl: then go to your room and sleep

fidget spinner: can u come iwth me tho

best girl: …

best girl: fine im coming

fidget spinner: yeeeeee

Panic! at the gender: is it just me or do high amity and boscha have game?

cantseeme: kind of jealous

cantseeme: might fuk around nd get high too

Panic! at the gender: emira no

cantseeme: too late

Panic! at the gender: fml

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dont do weed kids
> 
> the rough idea for this was brought to me by a discord friend so thank u val for this insanity


	6. Well this was a rollercoaster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> simp: SPENDIN ALL MY MONEY ON THAT
> 
> cantseeme: WET ASS PUSSY
> 
> Panic! at the gender: im afraid to even ask

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aha it gets a little nsfw here bc wap remix goes brr

**[3:21 pm]**

**[Amity created the chat {spread the sickness}]**

**[Amity added Boscha, Edric, Emira, Viney and Gus to {spread the sickness}]**

Amity: you are all here for one reason

Amity: and that is to play sickick music

Boscha: i fukin love ya u bastard

Amity: i-

Amity: thank u?

Edric: spREAD THE SICKNESS

Emira: STREAM SICKICK ON SPOTIFY YOU GAY BITCHES

Amity: i suddenly regret creating this

Emira: coward

Viney: can u all calm down for a sec

Emira: ofc babe

Edric: i hate it here

Boscha: welp the teach left

Boscha: m gonna blast high grade from my computer so does anyone wanna join me in math b

Edric: im joinin ya

Boscha: noice

Amity: wait but arent u all in class?

Emira: school is a social construct

Emira: we dont abide by social constructs in this house

Amity: but education is important

Emira: mittens

Emira: gender is a social construct too

Emira: nd u already rejected that one so

Amity: …

Amity: i see your point

Edric: yeEEEE MITTENS

Boscha: CMON DUDE JOIN US

Amity: i dont think i should

Boscha: DO IT OR UR CIS

Amity: …

Amity: im on my way

Boscha: WOOOOOOOO

Edric: LETS GO TEAM DUMBASS

**[Edric changed the chat name to {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason}]**

Emira: YEEEAAAHHHH

Viney: i dont know why i expected anything different

**[9:22 am]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

badboi: who’s playing sickick from the math room? Its rly good

fidget spinner: that would be me nd amity

badboi: o amity listens to sickick? Finally a girl who knows culture

simp: hruoiejwlk

fidget spinner: ffs gayass

simp: um actually luz

simp: im sorry to be a bother but

simp: uh

badboi: take ur time ami

simp: okay so

simp: uh

simp: im gonna start going by he/they pronouns from now on so can you maybe not call me girl?

simp: im sorry if im being a bother

badboi: nonononono ami ur totally valid

badboi: i can still call u ami right?

simp: yes my name is fine its simply my pronouns that changed

badboi: okay cool

badboi: then to rephrase

badboi: *clears throat*

badboi: finally a boi who knows culture

simp: ijdfpsaodk

fidget spinner: glad to know that no matter what pronouns amity uses they’re still a gay disaster

fidget spinner: anygays

cantseeme: wait bosch

cantseeme: what happened between u nd willow?

fidget spinner: aha

fidget spinner: THERES SOME HOES IN THIS HOUSE

fidget spinner: THERES SOME HOES IN THIS HOUSE

cantseeme: THERES SOME HOES IN THIS HOUSE

ededdndeddy: thERE’S SOME HOES IN THIS HOUSE

fidget spinner: IM A KILLER WHEN I GET IN THAT PUSSY

ededdndeddy: LICK YOU UP AND DOWN FROM YOUR LIPS TO YOUR-

simp: LICK YOU UP AND DOWN FROM YOUR LIPS TO YOUR-

fidget spinner: HIGH GRADE PUSSY PUSSY

ededdndeddy: PUSSY PUSSY

simp: HIGH GRADE PUSSY PUSSY

fidget spinner: PUSSY PUSSY

ededdndeddy: DRESSED IN DESIGNER GOT THAT HIGH GRADE PUSSY

simp: SLURPIN AND WET- ALL THAT-

fidget spinner: WET ASS PUSSY

simp: I CAN GIVE YOU-

skarapace: I CAN GIVE YOU DIAMONDS

fidget spinner: FLAWLESS

cantseeme: EAT YOU LIKE CHOCOLATE

simp: LOOKIN LIKE A TOPLESS GODDESS

skarapace: FUCK MODEST

simp: IM JUST BEING HONEST

cantseeme: BITCH

fidget spinner: IM FUKING HUNG LIKE A WALRUS

ededdndeddy: HIGH GRADE YEA YEA

simp: IN YOUR PUSSY PUSSY

cantseeme: HIGH GRADE-

fidget spinner: EVEN IF ITS BUSHIE BUSHIE

skarapace: DRESSED IN DESIGNER GOT THAT HIGH GRADE PUSSY

simp: SPENDIN ALL MY MONEY ON THAT

cantseeme: WET ASS PUSSY

Panic! at the gender: im afraid to even ask

fidget spinner: high grade came on so

ededdndeddy: we singin

Panic! at the gender: wait ur all singing this shit out loud? In class?

cantseeme: ye they are

cantseeme: ive never seen mittens go all out with smth this dumb before

Panic! at the gender: em wtf is happening

cantseeme: well bosch has the song on repeat nd her nd mittens r dancin on the table nd singing loudly

Panic! at the gender: …

badboi: i wanna see this

best girl: guys what?

Panic! at the gender: go control ur gf already

best girl: why would i need to control boscha? shes having fun

Panic! at the gender: yea bu-

Panic! at the gender: wait

Panic! at the gender: u didnt deny the gf thing im-

Panic! at the gender: did smth happen between u two that ud like to share with the class perhaps

best girl: not particularly no

cantseeme: sus

ededdndeddy: skRRT SKRRT

smol boi: jerbo is afraid of u all

cantseeme: ye im sure u made it seem like we all do meth or smth

fidget spinner: well

best girl: no

fidget spinner: gotta snort up all those antidepressants

simp: boscha no

fidget spinner: b o s c h a y e s

ededdndeddy: y e e h a w

fidget spinner: y i p p e k e y a m o t h e r fu c k e r

simp :  t̵̡̛̝͓̮͇̐͛͂̒ȋ̛̺̣̯̪͓̜͇̟̰̇̑̓̀̌m̶̧͇͈͉̰̺͔̬͈͊̌͐̚͞ȇ̢͙̗͍̦̫̈̽̒͒̉̈́̋͠ͅ a̗͔̱͉̙̎̊̏̒̂̀̾͜͢ñ̢̦͍̫͕̣͂͝d̸̛̤̘̘͙̘̤̒̆̄̀͞ t̸̼̣͙̳̬̖̟͓̦͂̓̽͗̊͜i̶̬̹͉̣̻͕̇̐̎̑̑̓̌̆̉͜m̼̬̼̰͙̘̦̪͔͒̊̑̊͝͡͡ẽ̵̩̟͕͇͔͖̼̂̑͐͂ á̙͍̦̦̗̯̟̲̈́͂͋̆̅̾̾͟g̛̪̳̮̼͈̉̃̾̀̾̊͜ạ̧̧̫̝̞̊̒͂̀̋͗̚̕͢͠ͅi͖̝̭͎͎̪͓̯̅̅͊̅̕̚͝n̶̠̤͕̮̳̹͕̗̏̾̅̉͊̚͘ y̵̧̗̠͎̰͆̽͌͗̐ȏ̶̧̢̳̭̲͉͆̎͌͒ͅu̵͎̤̗̹̳̝̗̠̽͑̿̉̓̌͋͢͠ h̵̨̡̭͉̯̙̯̾̔̉̀̾̚͟͠a̵̢̮̜̪̳͖͎̽̇̑̚͘̕v̷̙̟͙̯̠̲͇̅͂̾̅͊̽͡e̗̝̦̹̯̟̪̥̹̗̐̅̃̇̓̄͠ b̻̭̥͇̖͉͒̊̀͋͝ę̹̪̟̱̦͎̏̏̌̎̈́̍͜͜e̷̦͍̟̭̗͋̈̏̌̆̂̃̃̐ͅṅ̰͔͔̣͈͎̜̐̔̌́͘͟͠ ẉ̶̨͙̪͚̻̑͛̔̌̏͆͘a̸̢̢͕͎͚̋̽̑̕͜͠͡͡r̞̖̘̼͚̽̉̀̿̽͌͒̏̅͝ͅn̴̢̛̥͍̘̭͖͎̟͍̖͊͒̉͑̄̎̾̃͡ḙ̳̗͉͕̙̟̃͌͗͛̂͋̓̕d̨̛̖̲̖͍̦̾̌̊̄͐̋͌͜͝.͉̱̱̺̫̓͗̈́̓͞ Ì̶͓̘̲͙̭͖̅̈̌͘͘̚͞ͅ'̴̧̜͉̹̣̦̪̾̄̀̂̓͋̓͘̕͜v̛̼̤̳̠̖̱̩͆̍͋̒̓͆͌ę̸̫̜̱̯̀̅̊̕͝͝ b̨͇̥͎͇̝͍͎̓̾̒͛́͑͞ͅe̛̠̣͉͕͈̎͊͐̒̇̿̏̕͠ẽ̸̬̩̮͖͕̖̱̱̓̽͛̿̔̅ͅn̷͎̺̲͕̝̞̘͇̹̯̈́͒͑̇̆͛̚ p̹̤̗̙̰̿̓̏͐͞͞a̢͔̤̣͓͍͂̎̎̈́̃͘͠ṫ̮̝͖͓̘̑̾̈́͊̄͠͞i̷̯̘̺̦̺̦͊̿̿̃̈̔̆̚͝e̫̭͖̮̰̥̰͇͋̎͂̕͜͝ṋ̶̨̲͔̳͇͖͈̔̊̋̊̔͘͠ẗ̷͕̲̲͖̲̹͔̲̳͇̋̈́̋̊͋͒ ą̻̼̥͈͖͇̱̈̓͊͂̽̍́̍̚n̛̪̱̹̺͎͐̆̇̎̊̈͐̈́͠d̨̛̯̘͚͔͇͓̦̽͌̾̄̍͘ g̢͍̲͖̼͔͖̽̏̓̑̕͢͟͠į̠͕̥̳̎̓̌̃̂̌͘̕͢͢͝v̧̮̺̞̯̹͍̾͒̔̿͒͢e͙̹͍̖̲̻̍͗͐̑͛̌͒͞ͅn̨͚͔̩͓̠̼̥̻̙̋̎̓̽̔̚͠ ỳ̟̼̬͎͚̈́̐͐͑̚͘ơ̷̘̝̲͎̻͚̟͚͊̊̓̓̚͜ų̷̢̹̦͚̲̟͗̎̽͆̐̓̽̕͠ c̡̥̳͚̮͒͂̄́h̶̞͍̘̬̰̯͓͐̌̏̉̑͒̕͟͝ͅa̧̤͎͚̳̮̠̎͋̐̐̀͡n̨̜͕͈͉̫̯̾̋̓͑͊͐̐̚c̸̛̠̣̱̙̪͓̙͐̑͑̐͂̕̕̕ė̸̤̻̩͖͍͖͛̐̍̀̚͢͠͠͝͝s̨̢͖͈̫͔͈̺̋̇̌̌̇͛̂͟ t̜͓̘̦̜̜̗̆͂̈́͆͆̿͜ȯ̶̞̭̱̠̰͑̍͊̂͠͞ͅ  t̢̮͍̲̺̖͇̤̽̈̾̂̈͗̽͑͐ư̡̡̹͈̜͇̞̰̮̐͑̑̉͒̒͊̍͘͟r̡̰͖͈̝̣͚͔̃͒̒̊͂͜ͅň̛͇͎͉͙͎̠́͗̕ ô̶̼̹̯͇̬̮̗̾̋̾̚͠v̧̧̳̝̞͑̊̒͐̋͑̓̚̕͠e͉̬̟̦̼̣͗̓͐̉̒͝r̰̪̦̩̈͑̈̅ͅ a̸̢̡̤̬̤͓͌͆͆͌̀͜ n̡̠̪͉͓͖͍̠̔̇̐̑̊͢͟ę̶̗͍͍͍͓̞͚̤̈̎͐̏̓͂͌w̧̗̰̯̜̮̍̃̌͐̾͟͟͜ͅ l̵̢͔̩͓͇͙͚̍̔͆̒̅͛͟e̛̥̝̜̖͚̤͕͇̗͋̆͋̒̒͊a̶̡̧̹͚͈̖̎̎̿̄̆̕͞͠͠ͅf̨̛̤̖͖̯̣̙͖̖͐̈̍́̇͝.̸̛̮̗̘̪̻̒͒͑͆̐̉̚͟ B̧͖̘̦̣̪̫̞̓̇̅͢͡ͅȕ̞̜̭͖̜̲̣̦̪̾̏̐̂̇̈́ṯ̷̡͇͙̰̥̰͗̓͌͒͌̇́́͐͜ d̸͙͖̳̘̪̰̲̪͑̽̈́̅̿̔̚͘͘ͅḭ̸̢̝̜̦̥̪͓͊͑̃̈́͋̆̌d̨̙̪͉̲̿̊̊̈́͋̒͋͊̚͢͞ y̸̨͍̣͈̘̹̪̥͉͐̾̌͂̕͜ỏ̸̻̱̠̱͈̘̠͈̅̈́͐̽͘͝u̜̳̬͎̖̺̜̟̩̽͒̎͠͠ l͚̹͉͖̪̜̹̱̾͂̈́͊̽̚ȋ̴̫͓͚̫̝́͂̕̚s̶̬͔̙͚͆͗̓̑̽̚̕͢͡t̶̢̡̜̣̤̳͂̌̀͑͛̍e̵̫̦̟͕͚͒̐̃͂͟͡n̡͕͎̞͔͕̾̍̋̎͛͡͝ t̵̡͇̲̘̟̬̦̜͇̔̒̊͛̉̽́o̵̧̧̩̻̳̗͛͑̒̈́͋̽̈̕͢͝͝ m̨̡̛̘̤̦͙̱̼̙̑͒͘͞ỵ̴̭͈̬̘͊̄͋͑̆̽̉͘͜͞ s̸̢̨̱͕͚̻̿̈́͂̀̅̍̎i̸̢̗͓̟̝̝̱̩̮͑̿̇̄̆m̶̢̜͖̖̞̳̩̓̿̓͗͜͞p̵̡̛̥̲̹̩̽͗͜͜͞͠ḽ̶̢̹͇͌͛̒͂̒͗̄̾͟͡e̢͍͖̜͐̓̍̈́͑̚͢͝ r̳̜̘̯̖̆̂̂̋͋͑̐̌͝ë͍͖̹̫̮̗͇̻͍́̾͐̉̅̓́̍͜q̖̉̌͘͢͢͟͟͞͡ͅu̴̡̢̗̬̦̫̲̫̎̍͋̿̊͊̊̌ͅȩ̷̫̦̱̜̪̬̇͛́͗̐͟ş̢̣͕͖͚͍̳̓̌͋̍̚̕͝͝͞͡ţ͈͔͎̱͕͎͚̖̤͆̅̄̈̂͞͠?̸̫̙̩̞̙̘̾̃̒̿̈͂͢͠ ớ̥̥̱̺̫̮̘̤̙́͗̃̉͑̊̚ͅf̵̨̟̥̳̙̫̜͛̈́̉̑̕ͅ c̢̙͇̗̥͎̾́̆̀̃̚̕͡o͓̖̥̯̤͋͗͒̾̿̔͐̽͘ȗ̸͕̣͓͍͔͙̺͓͑̊̏̾̐̓̏͘ȓ̞̘̜̦̖̜̓̂̃͋s̨̫͔̗̮͈̻̾̿́̎͑̑͟͟͞͝͠e̶̡̧͔̣̩̠̊̆́̈͞͞͡ n͉͉̲̤̘͚̩͖͚̋̂̃̇̍ơ͈̻͔̘̺̟͖͛͗̐͡ͅt̨̨̤̣͇͉͋̇̿̔̔͡.̞͈͔̲̞͙̥̞̯̾̍̌̈́̕͢ Y̢̱͖̜̙̫̮̌͒͋̌̇͜͢͞͝o̴͔͔̝͓̤̞̓̒̽̍̊͂͜͡ư̸̛̥̹̞̣̝̖͈̌̈̽͑̊̐͐ v̸̛̛̳̗̘̭͎̳̮̗̱̖̔̄͗e̶̢̺̻̟̱̩͙̦̖͐̉̓͋̎͐h̙͈̪͉͔̐̒̋̍̕ḛ̸̢̨̮͍͍̪̜͈̟̈́̂̾̉̏̏͒͞͞m̲̦̲̣͍̠̩̣̦͗́̓͐͌ͅe̵̛̤̝̱͖̹̣͍̋͗̆̌̚͢͞ņ͚̪͎̫̄̅̒̉̂ť̵̢̫͚̗͔̮͙̤̇̀̽͌̃͒̾̄̽l̛̮̖͇̲̻̄̄̈́̐͌͊̿͝y̷͇̥̺̗̪̪͇̞̤͇̍́̋̂̑  d̹͕͔̹̩̝͉͂̃͊̔͐̀̚͢͟͡e̛̹͓̲̱͓̭̘̠͈͐̾̐̔̐̉č̙̜̤͚̩͊͛̓͛̆̎͞į̨̼͈̗̦̱͉̅̾̽̈͑̕͟d̵̢̫͍̟̰̺̮̬͛̀̓̕ȩ̧͓͖̗͛̓̂͛͒͂͠d̴̛̙̼̞̦̯̩͉͑͛̉̑͟ t̶̨͖͚̳͎̭̰̐̉̋͑̏̒͝ö̢̙̞̞͉̻̻́̽̏̉̇͠͝ c̷̛̦͓̱͚̼̗̼̘̀̓̄͠o̵͇̺͈̗̣͉̞͕͑̀͂͌͆͛̃͜͠͞͠n̸̡̥̝̺̼̗̂̈́͒̋͌̿̉̔͡t̨̛̼̼̙̮̖̫͇̾̓̈͟͠ĩ̵̥̮͕̩̹͕̖̒́̾̚͢n̴̡̯̜̻̹̬̬͋̽̎̑͘̕͞ư̡͔͚̜̥̘̾̓̂͗͒͞e̵̛̮̱̪̬̤̥̮̖̒̈́́͠͡ w̮̲̝̲̜̻̘̄̔̄̇͛̆̈́̉̕͟ȋ̢̢̙͙̩̃̀̅̈̀̾̚͝͡t̵̮͚̹̖̹̪̟̎̿̑̉͢͝ͅh͖̠͓͔̠̼̞͓̝͛͂͆̄̂̔͆͟͠ ÿ̡̢͚̠̝̼̺̘̭̌̇̈́͡͡o̢̨̝̦̯̤̝̜͆̏̅͘͘ư̢̨̰͎̗̳̊̑̿̿͝r̢͎͚̞̪̍͋̋̃͘͟ ụ̵̡͚͇̫͉̪͓̄͒͒͆̓̓̓͑̚n͓̥̪̥̭̿̊̅̾g̸̝͓̖͕̯̯̈͆̐̐̉̿̎̕͠o̸̘͙̱̮̮͖̤̻̱̊̏͂̂́̕̚̕͜d̡͈̻̲̰͎̫͖̈̃̿͗̾̐̈́̋͞l̛͈̱͚̗̣̻̱͇̒̓̔̑̆̈́̑͜y̸̞͕̗̦̬͕̿́̆͌̾̆͘͝͡ ẅ̢̦͈͕̬́̎̾͢͠͞ͅa̵̢͚̤̮͔̥̘̱̺̓̅̅̏̎̈̃̚͘y̸̠̗̜̗͍̔̋͛͒̏̀̀̋͞ṡ̛̖̪͔̣̤͎̯̮̀̃̉̾ͅ s̡̠̲̮̙͈̹̠͒̌͐̿͐o̸̻͎̞̯̙̘̞͍͍̎̇͋̐͗̈͜ ŷ̷̡̬̻̩͉̼̳͚̌̐͊̎̕̕͘͜͠ó̷͇̜̭͕̥̪̲͂̔̋̿͊̆̕͟u̢͙̙̜̱̖͆̆̀͋͌͢ s̨̛̥̺͍͚̆͌͊̆̎̂̓h̨̛̼͓̺̯̯̾̽̑̍̂̏̑͟͡a̷̢͔̞̦͇͔̬̝̬͒̒̂́͘l̡̝̖̺͍̥͓̜̺̓͌̓̀̓̍͘ͅl̪̼̮̹̮̠͔̂̃͊̉̆͌̽͜͝ n͕̲̙̱̓̂͑̓͊͘͘̚͜o̻̲͕̟̲̪͙̻͋̒̈́̈́͋̔̕ŵ̸̢̥̯̦͙̭̫̦̻̇͌̚͜͝ p̡̮̗̩͈͙̿̃̕͠å̡̨̫̰̼̊́̍̃̉̌͟y̸̛̪͈͙̟̤̗̒͂̎̃̊͂̾̋̔͟ t̟̠̖̟̖͔́̑̈̆̄̇͞h̶̡̟̮̘̫̙̮̮̔͒̉̓̓̄͊̿͘e̴͓̦̠̹̘̯̤̯̔͗́̓̕͟͜ p̶̩̱̺̭͉͍̀͊͗̓͑͆͢r̸͖̮̮͔̩̩̻̻͒̕͘͜͡͠i̸͖̟͖̺̱̔̇͛̂̀͐c̶̹͓̖̫̗͖̽̀̅̂̐̈́͞͠ȩ̨̛͈̳̭̺͔̥̥̾͂̐͊͐̾.̶̡̨̛̱͙̟̤͖͇̼͒͆̈́̂̚͡

badboi: I-

fidget spinner: WTF AMITY?

best girl: hes at the end of his rope

fidget spinner: CLeARLy wTF?

cantseeme: @fidget spinner this is all ur fault

fidget spinner: what? Why?

cantseeme: idk it just is

fidget spinner: *clears throat*

fidget spinner: The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20-meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. *beep* A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. *ding* Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.

cantseeme: What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little  _ clever _ comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

fidget spinner: If you write ANYTHING on your computer, YOU NEED TO GET GRAMMARLY. I write pretty much ALL DAY every day and GRAMMARLY makes my writing better. As a student, I like that it's FREE It actually is... correcting everything as I'm writing it. Grammar errors and spelling errors... IT EVEN helps me find the right words to use!! SO I can say what I want to say!! It catches all those embarrassing little mistakes BEFORE I HIT SEND!!! I download GRAMMARLY around my freshman year because I was just  **H̶̡̧̛͉̳̺̰̩̫͊͗̽̑͌̌̈́ Ȏ̸͕͇̻̟͍̦̠͊̆̄͊̒̿͜ͅ Ṟ̵̡̙̳̦̘̣̻̾̌̍͌̒͆̾̿̉͜ R̡̨̜̯͕̒͗͑͐͌̕͠ I̸̝͇͉͇̺̠̪̘͖̾͗̃́͗͜͞ B̎́̔̃͐̒** ̧̬̬̘̺̟̠̌͛͘ **Ļ̷̹̼̺̺͈̺̲̻͔̈́̓̑̀̋̍̅͡E̹̝̤̤̩̤͋̋̊͊̄̊̚͝** at typing! Grammarly is like my secret weapon for writing papers. It's just the PERFECT tool for your resume, you know you don't want ANY errors when it's your first impression. I use GRAMMARLY for important emails, social media posts. I've used EVERY TOOL OUT THERE!! And Grammarly is by far the ＢＥＳＴ for improving your writing. GRAMMARLY is making me a better writer. AND it's free. I would recommend GRAMMARLY if you're a student, my family, my peers, my colleagues, It's like having YOUR OWN personal proof-reader for free.

badboi: eye-

ededdndeddy: *sniff* They are battling for dominance

skarapace: im watching two gods fighting

skarapace: tHE TEACHER IS HERE SO WE BETTER FIND A GOOD HIDING SPOT BEFORE HE COMES OVER HERE AND SHAVES OUR HEADS

fidget spinner: Oh FUCK

ededdndeddy: RUN BITCH

skarapace: IF WE N A R U T O R U N WE CAN DODGE HIM

fidget spinner: L E T S G O T E A M D U M B A S S

cantseeme: E Y E E Y E C A P T A I N

skarapace: R I G H T B E H I N D U C H I E F

best girl: im going to bed

badboi: you guys are W I L D

skarapace: wait fuk wheres amity

fidget spinner: o fuk hes still back there

ededdndeddy: sucks to suck

fidget spinner: rip amity

fidget spinner: they will be greatly remembered as a simp

best girl: amity isnt dead boscha

fidget spinner: its the lack of evidence for me

Panic! at the gender: i mean willow has a point

fidget spinner: ur honor thats cap

simp: im stILL ALIVE YOU FUCKS

fidget spinner: hoes mad ur honor

simp: YOU BITCH

simp: I HAVE DETENTION NOW

fidget spinner: wait u can get detention in uni?

simp: i-

simp: yES

fidget spinner: o shit

fidget spinner: so thats what all those notes were for

best girl: …

best girl: moving on from that

simp: no im not done

simp: cmere bosch im gonna kill u

fidget spinner: no u

simp: no cause if i wanted to kill myself i would climb all the way up to your ego and drop down to your iq level

ededdndeddy: JHDFSLKJGGH

cantseeme: REKT

skarapace: o mY GOF AMITY

ededdndeddy: G O F

fidget spinner: shut up amity

fidget spinner: uve been blessed to be friends with my great self so the least u could do is be gratful

simp: id rather nOT have to deal with a pepto bismol x strawberry shortcake 100k slowburn looking ass bitch everyday but here i am

cantseeme: IM FUKING WHEEZING GUYS

Panic! at the gender: amity rly is at the end of his rope

skarapace: OMY FDUYHOSIFSNJKDL

fidget spinner: hello 911 id like to report a crime

skarapace: hello crime id like to report a 911

badboi hello report id like to crime a 911

cantseeme: report hello like id 911 to crime

ededdndeddy: 911 report crime id hello to like

Panic! at the gender: crime

skarapace: r e p o rt

fidget spinner: H HE LL O

simp: I’m having a stroke what am I reading

fidget spinner: good now stop bullying me

best girl: babe pls calm down

fidget spinner: okie habibti

cantseeme: bABE?

ededdndeddy: B A B E

Panic! at the gender: HABIBTI?

smol boi: aww you two finally got together :D

ededdndeddy: im-

fidget spinner: surprise

simp: congratulations

badboi: yeeeee :DD

cantseeme: saw it comin from a mile away tbh

ededdndeddy: ^

Panic! at the gender: ^

cantseeme: how did boscha even manage that tho

fidget spinner: first of all rude

fidget spinner: second of all I wooed flowers with my stunning personality and awesome pick up lines

best girl: yeah,,

best girl: seeing someone do the macarena to the jingle of the ice cream truck just hits different i guess

cantseeme: tHAT BITCH DIDNT

ededdndeddy: O MY FUK BOSCHB

fidget spinner: shut

best girl: it was an experience

best girl: she did the macarena then took off her shirt nd kissed me

best girl: again it was an experience but i was glad to find out that boscha has abs

skarapace: hot

skarapace: wait nO

skarapace: fml

skarapace: bYE

**[skarapace went idle]**

fidget spinner: eye-

cantseeme: nd i fukin oop-

ededdndeddy: o O P

Panic! at the gender: OwO what is this

simp: regardless of all that just happened

simp: boscha square tf up

fidget spinner: I’m cute and very poor and I’d like some money so pls dont be mad at me

simp: absolutely forgiven here is my wallet, my room key, and I dont have a wife but if I did you could bonk her

fidget spinner: rly?

simp: fuk no u better run

best girl: right well im gonna go check on skara, and amity?

simp: yes

best girl: please dont do too much damage to boschas face i quite like kissing it

simp: noted

fidget spinner: wDYM NOTEDNKJRIHEUOFSDJIJ

fidget spinner: WILLOE HEPL ME

simp: suffer

**[fidget spinner and simp went idle]**

badboi: o wow

badboi: amity looks hot when he’s mad ngl

ededdndeddy: i-

badboi: im right

best girl: yes i agree with that statment

Panic! at the gender: yes

ededdndeddy: okay but why do amity nd boscha like genuinely have god level game when they’re not paniking?

cantseeme: i guess its a secret

**[2:12 pm]**

fidget spinner: guess what we need to read for langlit

ededdndeddy: shakespeare?

fidget spinner: the 120 days of sodom

ededdndeddy: ASDFGHJKLyckfb’;m

Panic! at the gender: why are you reading porn?

fidget spinner: welcome to AP literature were u can read porn without being a pervert because it’s in the syllabus

cantseeme: now I wish I had taken AP lit

ededdndeddy: u pervert

cantseeme: u literally watched porn in front of me last night

ededdndeddy: u were there too so ur argument is invalid

simp: I’m depressed <3

badboi: <3

simp: hbkjdfsaiuh

smol boi: Why are you sending pacman eating breasts?

ededdndeddy: eye-

fidget spinner: thANKS, NOW I CAN’T UNSEE IT

best girl: boscha meet me in my dorm please

fidget spinner: sure thing babe

cantseeme: ooo what r yall gonna do?

fidget spinner: none of ur business fukin seaweed lookin bitch

cantseeme: tell me or ill eat ur showercurtain

fidget spinner: they’re glass dumbass

cantseeme: well crunch munch bitch u think thats gonna stop me?

best girl: boscha ignore her

fidget spinner: yes ma’am

cantseeme: whipped

fidget spinner: listen here bitch

best girl: boscha no

fidget spinner: okie

simp: did willow just? manage to tame? Boscha?

Panic! at the gender: seems like it

simp: im-

simp: at a loss for words

ededdndeddy: yet here u are still talking

simp: …

badboi: i was trynna watch a mukbang whats happening now?

cantseeme: willow nd bosch went to make out, skara is still mia nd ed just destroyed mittens whole entire career

badboi: ah

simp: not to be a bother but what is a mukbang?

cantseeme: meet me in the living room and ill show u

Panic! at the gender: which one r u showing him?

cantseeme: nikocado avocado

ededdndeddy: EMIRA NOADHKSLJKGD;SAF

Panic! at the gender: rip amity

cantseeme: hold up imma go traumatize a bitch

ededdndeddy: show them the mental breakdown™ video

cantseeme: which one? They’re all mental breakdowns

Panic! at the gender: im not paying for the therapy that hes going to inevitably need after

cantseeme: fair

smol boi: dont sleep late

badboi: what why?

smol boi: class tomorrow?

ededdndeddy: o fuk

ededdndeddy: bye im going to kill myself and its ur fault school

cantseeme: join me instead mittens is making the funniest fucking face and its hilarious

ededdndeddy: coming

**[6:23 pm]**

**[{team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason}]**

Amity: i hate everyone of you

Edric: aww that hurts mittens

Amity: good

Amity: i cant believe emira just left that on and went to cuddle with viney

Emira: well u know what they say

Emira: hoes before bros

Amity: i-

Edric: its actually bros before hoes

Emira: I know what I said and I stand by my mistakes

Amity: unlike my dad

Viney: AMITY WTFKSAGDHJDFLG;SAJ

Edric: that reply has me DEAD

Emira: lmao team daddy issues square up

**[Emira changed the chat name to {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

Viney: thats too long

Boscha: thats what she said

Viney: …

Amity: help

Boscha: no help for u simp

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes amity is now a he/they lesbian bc I'm projecting :)


	7. Respec women kids

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amity: dont drink it pls
> 
> Edric: but luz brought it mittens. If u dont have it she’ll be sad
> 
> Amity: …
> 
> Amity: ill be there in five minutes

**[3:12 am]**

**[{team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

Boscha: fi yuo cna raed tihs yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno’t mtaetr in what oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae

Amity: i-

Amity: pls

Amity: wHY

Boscha: baeusce

Amity: boscha its 3 am pls

Boscha: fnie

**[8:12 am]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

badboi: i aM AWAKE

simp: i see that beautiful things just naturally rise with the sun

badboi: aww amity thats so sweet

simp: hsfudljif i try

fidget spinner: ...

**[Boscha created {you gay fuk}]**

**[Boscha added Amity to {you gay fuk}]**

Boscha: what the actual fuck was that dude?

Boscha: isEE ThAt beAUtiFUL ThinGS JusT NAturAllY rISe wITh tHE SuN

Amity: I don’t know

Boscha: y did u say that to her u uSELesS LESBIAN diSAStER

Amity: LEAVE ME ALONE

Boscha: u know lesbians get such a bad rep for being useless and now i know why, its bc of yOUR SLOW MOVING ASS

Boscha: U AND LUZ ARE LITERALLY THE DEFINITION OF GALS(guys, whatever) BEING PALS

Boscha: MAKE AN ACTUAL MOVE U dUMBASS

Amity: RELATIONSHIPS TAKE TIME BOSCHA

Boscha: U AREN’T EVEN IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH LUZ YET

Amity: sHUT UP IT’S A SLOWBURN

Boscha: wELL TICK TOCK DUMBASS, WE’RE ALL WAITING FOR U TWO TO JUST BONE ALREADY

Amity: dON’T RUSH ME

Boscha: u better ask her out am or istg

Boscha: u still hold doors open for her like ur roMEO LOOKING FOR HIS FUKING JULIET

Boscha: U KEEP GIVING HER HEART EYES 24/7 AND IT MAKES ME PHYSICALLY SICK

Amity: YEAH BUT WHEN I TRY TO HIT ON HER SHE ACTS SOOBLIVIOUS. LIKE IT SURPRISES ME THAT SHE FIGURED OUT THAT SHE WAS BI ON HER OWN AT THIS PACE SHE WOULD HAVE BEEN STRAIGHT FOR YEARS

Boscha: UP UR GAME THEN

Boscha: MAKE THE GAY TENTION STRONGER AND PIN HER AGAINST THE WALL AND KISS HER!!!

Amity: thatS LITERALLY SEXUAL ASSAULT boSCHA

Amity: im bocking u

Boscha: do it u wont

Amity: try me

**[Amity changed Boscha to idiot]**

idiot: binch

**[idiot changed Amity to dumbgayboi]**

dumbgayboi: i see your point

idiot: good now ask luz out

dumbgayboi: no

idiot: dicKHEAD

**[10:12 am]**

**[{team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

Amity: boscha can you and willow not make out in my room?

Boscha: we share a fukin dorm dumbass

Amity: okay but dont make out on my bED MAYBE?

Boscha: yall hear smth?

Amity: boscha pls

Emira: guys wtf

Boscha: dw about it

Boscha: guys, come down to the science room luz brought kombucha for us all

Edric: I don’t like kombucha

Amity: ^

Emira: ^

Boscha: u dont understand

Boscha: matt tried it and spit it out, u know what that means?

Emira: it’s now Respecting Women Juice

Boscha: yUP

Amity: dont drink it pls

Edric: but luz brought it mittens. If u dont have it she’ll be sad

Amity: …

Amity: ill be there in five minutes

Boscha: I drank too much respecting woman juice

Boscha: now im gay

Emira: lets go bitch

Edric: chug chug chug bitch

Viney: wow

Viney: wish I was there

Boscha: get ur ass over here then

Viney: but im at the store

Boscha: hmm

Edric: sounds like u dont respect women vin

Viney: stay right where u r im omw

Boscha: YAAAAYY11!!!!!!

Emira: WOOOOOOOOOOO!O!O!!

Edric: leTS GO BITCHES!

Emira: lmao luz looks so confused

Boscha: is she drinking it too?

Edric: with how bi she is she better be

Emira: lmao yea

Boscha: good

Viney: im here and ready to respect women

Boscha: lets go team

Gus: can I join?

Boscha: ofc my sweet summer child

Gus: I was born in winter

Boscha: …

Emira: fdsAGHFGKHJL moving on chug ur drink bitches

Amity: it actually doesn’t taste that bad why did matt spit it out

Emira: cause hes a little bitch who doesn’t know how to respect wOMEN

Boscha: aight imma head out

Edric: ye i can hear willow callin u from here u simp

Boscha: im not a simp thats amity’s brand

Amity: …

Edric: ur both simps™

Boscha: …

**[Boscha left {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

Edric: no

**[Edric added Boscha to {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

Edric: no escape u gay fuk

Boscha: pls

Edric: pls wat?

Boscha: pLS

**[Boscha left {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

Boscha: P L S

**[Boscha left {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

**[Boscha left {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

**[Boscha left {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

Boscha: ED PLS

Edric: no

**[Boscha left {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

**[Boscha left {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

**[Boscha left {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

Amity: should i even bother?

Emira: they’ll tire themselves out give it time

**[Boscha left {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

**[Boscha left {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

Boscha: eD ISTG

Edric: no

**[Boscha left {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {team dumbass + two(2) voices of reason + a gay with daddy issues}]**

**[Emira changed the chat name to {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Boscha left {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Boscha left {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Boscha left {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Boscha left {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Boscha left {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Boscha left {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Boscha left {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Edric added Boscha to {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

Boscha: BY ALLAH IF YOU DONT STOP I WILL BEAT YOU WITH MY FUKING SHOE EDRIC

Edric: u dont scare me

Boscha: tHEN PREPARE TO HAVE FURY RAIN DOWN ON YOU YOU FUKIN HARAM LOOKIN ASS

Amity: i dont think thats the proper wai to use that word

Boscha: EXCUSE ME BUT WHO HERE IS THE MUSLIM?

Amity: you

Boscha: EXACTLY SO SHUT YOUR MOUTH BEFORE I LET THE POWER OF THE JINNS RAIN DOWN ON YOUR ASS

Emira: hot

Boscha: JHDFLSKJLKFDS

Emira: can i interest u in a threesome?

Boscha: JHLDSFIJKJFDIOSASKL

Amity: emira wh-

Edric: i think em just has a thing for ppl going feral

Amity: …

Amity: and out of everyone she chose viney?

Emira: hsdljujkASDIFGK

Edric: mittens throwing shade?

Edric: its more likely than you think

Viney: i can be feral

Emira: you sure can babe

Boscha: they can?

Emira: have a threesome with me nd vin nd find out

Boscha: wat

Emira: come;) here;) and;) find;) out;)

Boscha: help

Amity: emira wtf

Emira: shh im trying smth

Emira: so boscha

Emira: waddya say ;)

Boscha: uh

Boscha: while the idea of sleeping with two hot ppl sounds amazing

Boscha: willow owns my heart so im gonna have to pass

Emira: mmm good ;)

Boscha: i-

Boscha: i feel like i just passed some kind of test wtf

Emira: just;) making;) sure;) that;) you;) are;) worthy;) of;) our;) little;) flowerpot;) and;) deserve;) her;) trust;)

Boscha: help

Amity: i dont even knw anymore

Viney: dww about it

**[Emira created {TRANS-atlantic trade}]**

**[Emira added Boscha to {TRANS-atlantic trade}]**

Emira: okay but srsly tho im sry if i made u uncomfy

Boscha: nononon i was just confusion

Emira: lmao understandable

Boscha: wait so u dont find me hot?

Boscha: phew

Emira: well i never said that ;)

Boscha: jdhfluijks

Emira: id be lying if i said i didnt fee anythin down there when u went feral ;)

Emira: oop vin is callin me bye

Boscha: …

Boscha: allah help me pls

**[11:12 pm]**

**[{The gays of the third floor}]**

fidget spinner: ey babe can i just say you looked amazing in that hoodie but im sure you would look even better out of it ;)

skarapace: pss wrong chat

fidget spinner: o fuk

skarapace: dumbass

best girl: hhhhh yep

fidget spinner: ur dumbass tho

best girl: tragically

fidget spinner >:0

best girl: at least you’re a cute dumbass

skarapace: lmao

fidget spinner: yea lmao ;b

**[1:12 am]**

ededdndeddy: smh gays being gay

ededdndeddy: wait but willow wasnt wearing a hoodie yesterday

ededdndeddy: w a i t

ededdndeddy: cHEATER

cantseeme: lets not jump to conclusions

ededdndeddy: i mean thats sus

cantseeme: wait

cantseeme: but who was wearing a hoodie yesterday then?s

ededdndeddy: luz

simp: no

simp: luz was wearing a turtleneck yesterday not a hoodie

cantseeme: so what u just keep track of what luz wears? thats very gay mittens

ededdndeddy: r u sure ur not saying that bc u have the hots for [REDACTED] nd dont want to think of boscha dating her?

simp: EDRIC THIS ISNT A PRIVATE CHAT DELETE THAT THIS INSTANT OR SO HELP ME GOD

ededdndeddy: hmm sry mittens

cantseeme: back to our chickens

cantseeme: who was wearing a hoodie yesterday?

simp: hmm wasnt bo wearing a hoodie?

cantseeme: oOOOH

ededdndeddy: wait but bo nd boscha r too much of bros to be together

ededdndeddy: nd u know the bro code

cantseeme: bros dont crush on bros ofc

simp: thats great and all but we still have no leads now

cantseeme: tru

cantseeme: eh ill worry about it later cause its late nd i wanna go play games

cantseeme: so goodnight lgbt community

ededdndeddy: isnt it lgbtqqiaa?

cantseeme: uh for lesbian, gay, bi, trans, queer, questioning, intersex, asexual nd aromantic no?

simp: wawit but intersex isnt technically part of the lgbt community no?

ededdndeddy: idk

simp: cause being intersex is a biological condition right

ededdndeddy: mittens i can barely count past 100 do u rly think that i know this science shit?

simp: fair i guess

cantseeme: aight well gn ppl

ededdndeddy: wat about u mittens?

simp: i havent known sleep since 1991

ededdndeddy: damn okay

badboi: ami u needa sleep

simp: i do

badboi: if u dont slep im gonna come over there nd cuddle u

simp: hmm

simp: wont u look at that im gonna stay at my desk and work

badboi: im omw

**[badboi went idle]**

cantseeme: nd u still think she doesnt like u?

simp: shut

**[4:23 am]**

simp: wait i know others who were wearing a hoodie yesterday

simp: viney and skara

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so
> 
> i originally wrote the four next chapters of this but fsr my computer didn't back up so I lost 65 pages worth of work :')
> 
> I'm gonna try nd rewrite wat I wrote but my memory is shit so idk


	8. Angst? in my fic? it's more likely than you think

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emira: huh?
> 
> Edric: welp im gonna go walk my fish peace
> 
> Emira: help wtf?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw// some suicide mention

**[8:28 am]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

fidget spinner: jingle bell jingle bell jingle bell rock

fidget spinner: If u touch me ill beat u with my cock

cantseeme: bOSCH A SIDHUFJK

simp: well this was a surprise to wake up to

fidget spinner: good

fidget spinner: gotta keep u on ur toes

ededdndeddy: its november u dumb fuk

ededdndeddy: also

**[Edric created {heard that u were talkin shit}]**

**[Edric added Amity, Boscha, Emira, Viney, Luz and Gus to {heard that u were talkin shit}]**

Boscha: i feel like ive done smth to anger u

Edric: boscha

Edric: can u pls explain to the jury who u were referring to when u said nd i quote ‘ey babe can i just say you looked amazing in that hoodie but im sure you would look even better out of it ;)’?

Boscha: willow

Edric: hAH NO

Edric: cause willow wasn’t wearing a hoodie yesterday

Edric: so in conclusion, u are cheating on willow with some hoodie-wearing whore

Edric: ladies nd gentlemen of the jury i have made my case

Boscha: how fuking dare yoou

Luz: in the words of my step-mom’s dog

Luz: weh?

ededdndeddy: huh?

Boscha: yes how fuking dare you

Boscha: dO YOU RLY THINK THAT I WOULD STOOP SO LOW AS TO CHEAT ON WILLOW?

Boscha: IF I FELT THE NEED TO CHEAT THEN THAT WOULD MEAN THAT I DIDNT LOVE HER ANYMORE AND IM SURE U KNOW ME ENOUGH TO KNOW THAT I WOULD HAVE FUKING T A L K E D TO HER AND NOT FUKING CHEATED ON HER

Boscha: THIS ISNT RELEVANT ANYWAYS CAUSE THE FACT OF THE MATTER IS THAT I STILL LOVE WILLOW AND NO I DIDNT FUKING CHEAT ON HER

Amity: then who was the text directed to?

Amity: if you dont mind me asking

Boscha: its none of ur fukin business if im being honest

Boscha: this is between me nd willow nd skara

Boscha: wait fuk

Edric: hAH

Boscha: i mean

Boscha: fukin hell

**[Boscha left {heard that u were talkin shit}]**

Edric: another job well done bois

Luz: that was kind of rude ed

Edric: huh?

Edric: but wouldnt u have wanted to tell willow if boscha was cheating on her?

Amity: luz is right edric

Amity: if u had bothered to read the rest of the messages you would know that willow answered to boscha’s accidental message meaning that she saw it and knew that it was either directed at her for unknown reason or that she knew it was directed at someone else which also means that she’s okay with whatever it is that boscha is doing

Amity: so either way whatever is happening with boscha willow is aware of it so we shouldnt have butted in

Amity: anyways im going to go my early classes so bye

**[Amity left {heard that u were talkin shit}]**

Emira: huh?

Edric: welp im gonna go walk my fish peace

Emira: help wtf?

**[10:43 am]**

**[{ooo baby a triple}]**

feral gf: u okay so we have a problem

cutie: what happened boscha?

feral gf: i may have accidentally let it slip that me u nd skara are a thing

cutie: accidentally?

feral gf: u yes but i think they got the memo

⅓ of the gf sandwich: lmao oof

**[feral gf changed ⅓ of the gf sandwich to baby girl baby]**

baby girl baby: i hate it here

cutie: wait

**[cutie changed baby girl baby to artistic gf]**

artistic gf: i like it

cutie: good

feral gf: so what are we gonna do about the others?

cutie: if they ask we answer and if they dont we dont

artistic gf: this is why willow is the brain in the relationship

**[feral gf changed cutie to smart gf]**

smart gf: as i should

feral gf: but anyways

feral gf: can i get a make out sesh in before class?

artistic gf: why are u always so affection demanding

feral gf: bc i have crippling anxiety and a need for constant affection or ill start to think that im unworthy of love and should die

artistic gf: …

artistic gf: stay where u are beautiful person immabout to make it rain affection on ur ass

feral gf: yahufsidjklidjfo

artistic gf: wait where are you?

artistic gf: nvm i see u in the science courtyard

artistic gf: now prepare to be given affection o wonderful gf of mine

feral gf: hsdjfakl

smart gf: hug machine is active

smart gf: looking for target

smart gf: target spotted, initiating hug tackle

smart gf: incoming

feral gf: o fUKDSNIHFUHJNOUDF

**[5:23 pm]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

simp: i want to die

simp: it would be so easy

simp: just one careful stab

simp: then poof

simp: wait shit this isnt the dm

simp: putain

simp: im sorry

**[5:30 pm]**

cantseeme: hi wtf

ededdndeddy: hey mittens r u good?

fidget spinner: @simp

fidget spinner: @simp

fidget spinner: @simp

fidget spinner: @simp

fidget spinner: @simp

fidget spinner: @simp

fidget spinner: @simp

fidget spinner: @simp

fidget spinner: @simp

fidget spinner: @simp

fidget spinner: @simp

fidget spinner: @simp

fidget spinner: @simp

fidget spinner: @simp

Panic! at the gender: this isnt working

fidget spinner: lets go look for this dumbass then

fidget spinner: i think i have an idea of where he could be but its outside the school

skarapace: ill go with u

badboi: yea same

fidget spinner: okay then me skara nd luz r gonna go outside to look for her nd u all can look around campus

fidget spinner: lets move out team

ededdndeddy: aight

fidget spinner: ur still on thin fukin ice

ededdndeddy: fair

fidget spinner: okay lets go

**[5:40 pm]**

**[{gay dumbasses}]**

eye am gay: amity where tf are u?

eye am gay: istg if ur at the bridge im gonna fukin lose it

eye am gay: o ur not

eye am gay: good

eye am gay: but dude am where are u

eye am gay: mate pls

eye am gay: pls dont die now

eye am gay: ur literally a foot into law school already

eye am gay: i still wanna see u tearing ppl apart in court so pls

eye am gay: dont fukin die

eye am gay: we’de all be sad

eye am gay: especially luz

straight hair: luz wouldnt care no one would

eye am gay: ofc we would

eye am gay: luz nd skara r with me rn so ill give u proof

**[eye am gay requested a call]**

**[eye am gay’s call was accepted]**

**[call ended]**

**[call duration {00:10:00} hours]**

**[6:02 pm]**

**[{The gays of the third floor}]**

cantseeme: bOSCHA BINCH WHAT HAPPENED?

ededdndeddy: dont leave us hanging on this pls

fidget spinner: amity is fine

fidget spinner: we talked them through it nd got him a cat nd he heasnt put it down since

Panic! at the gender: @simp im glad that you are doing okay now but pls know that if you ever feel like this again you can talk to use amity. Most of us know what you are going through and we would be glad to help

simp: yea thanks viney ill keep that in mind

ededdndeddy: what made u feel that way mittens?

cantseeme: if its mom nd dad again im gonna kill them

simp: its fine

simp: i just got the usual ‘u are being a disappointment and should do better in your studies talk’

cantseeme: we goin on a crusade bois cmon

ededdndeddy: lets go comrades

skarapace: im joinin

**[ededdndeddy, cantseeme and skarapace went idle]**

simp: …

simp: they arent actually gonna kill my parents right?

fidget spinner: im gonna join them real quick wait

simp: …

simp: help

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hah angst :')


	9. simp you've done it again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fidget spinner: o my fuking god wtf
> 
> badboi: hey dont make fun of amity he cant help who he gets a crush on :/
> 
> ededdndeddy: pLS IM WWHEEZING HELP

**[12:43 am]**

**[{The gays of the third floor}]**

fidget spinner: amity get your fucking cat

simp: hmm?

fidget spinner: your fucking monster of a cat killed bo’s parrot and now its parading around the floor with the dead bird in its mouth

fidget spinner: i dont even know anymore

cantseeme: ASFDHGJFHKGJLHAMITYWOULDDOTHATIFTHEYWEREACATISTG

simp: jull is beautiful, she’s just showing what an avid hunter she is

fidget spinner: shes now bringing it to luz’s cat and her chest is all puffed out and shit

badboi: o so thats where bella went

skarapace: shes proud

cantseeme: u fool they’re in lesbians with each other

fidget spinner: the cats?

cantseeme: yeah, shes showing her wife that she brought dinner home

badboi: thats so fucking cuteasldjkh

badboi: im sure she learned from the best

simp: jhlfdsakg

fidget spinner: idk bella is licking jull’s nose

fidget spinner: i dont know anymore

smol boi: aww

ededdndeddy: they lesbianing together

cantseeme: funny how a cat can be a better gf than boscha

fidget spinner: u better shut the fuck up before u get smacked the fuck up bitch

ededdndeddy: oop-

Panic! at the gender: you people are a disaster

fidget spinner: shut up basic white bitch no one cares

cantseeme: say that shit to vin again i dare you you fuking arab bitch

fidget spinner: u heard me loud and clear colonial slut

simp: can we not have a race war right now?

fidget spinner: the day you actually get the balls to confess to your crush instead of pinning from afar will be the day when you are allowed to enter these types of conversations. Sadly you are still single as fuk and haven’t said shit to ur crush so butt out of matters that dont concern u simp and let the adults talk

simp: …

badboi: wait amity has a crush?

badboi: tell me who it is im gonna set you up with them

skarapace: …

skarapace: wtf gays

simp: nkjfdgsil

fidget spinner: o my fuking god wtf

badboi: hey dont make fun of amity he cant help who he gets a crush on :/

ededdndeddy: pLS IM WWHEEZING HELP

fidget spinner: OMY FUK AMITUYRUHIFDJKN

cantseeme: THIS IS SO GOOD PLS

badboi: so amity

badboi: tell me whos ur crush :3

simp: hjgfklsd

simp: um

simp: istfd

ededdndeddy: i cant pls help

fidget spinner: im cACKLING HELP

badboi: yeees :33333

simp: i-

badboi: pls tell me

simp: uhkfjdkhgsuijkl

simp: itsfd

simp: bo

fidget spinner: …

cantseeme: …

ededdndeddy: …

skarapace: …

best girl: …

smol boi: ,’:|

fidget spinner: BHFGUKDJLS GUS

skarapace: IM DYING HEWNRIJFOKDP

ededdndeddy: THIS FUKING TAKES THE CAKE PLS

badboi: ooooo thats okay amity

badboi: operation get amity a gf is a go

simp: kjdflhseqrw

skarapace: pls wtf

fidget spinner: simp uve done it again, constantly raising the bar for the circus and doing it foolishly

skarapace: dhufsoijlk

fidget spinner: bITCH WTF

simp: leave me alone

best girl: im not helping

Panic! at the gender: can you please stop? emira and I are trying to watch v for vendetta

best girl: v for vagina

ededdndeddy: ADSdfghJlkj;ASDFGHJKL

cantseeme: wiLLOWHFDJKGAS

fidget spinner: the snack that smiles back! :D

**[best girl kicked fidget spinner from {The gays of the third floor} for {00:05:00} hours]**

simp: …

best girl: shes in time out

cantseeme: rip boscha

cantseeme: but aha v is for vagina

simp: em no

cantseeme: p is for pussy

cantseeme: p is also for punani

simp: emira pls stop

cantseeme: c is for cunt

smol boi: ,’:|

cantseeme: oop sry gus

Panic! at the gender: wats happening?

cantseeme: hey babe guess what

Panic! at the gender: hmm?

cantseeme: pussy

Panic! at the gender: yes so tru

ededdndeddy: can yall not for 2 min

simp: funny coming from you

ededdndeddy: shut

**[1:12 pm]**

skarapace: thx babe

skarapace: also

skarapace: the teacher just asked luz to say smth interesting about herself nd this geNIUS

skarapace: stood nd said

skarapace: ‘my favorite part of the Gatorade squeeze bottles is that it feels like you're drinking it straight from the alligator’s nipple’

fidget spinner: djhfslkhjdh perfect

fidget spinner: @simp ;)

simp: stop

simp: ive been feeling like shit as it is i dont need this now

fidget spinner: who do i need to kill

simp: wait shit no

simp: fuck

simp: bYE

**[simp left {the gays of the third floor}]**

fidget spinner: this fuking drama kind istg

**[fidget spinner added Amity to {the gays of the third floor}]**

**[fidget spinner changed Amity to babyboi]**

babyboi: why

fidget spinner: cause ur a babyboi who needs to be protected

fidget spinner: like gus

smol boi: yay :D

cantseeme: gus is so precious istg

cantseeme: ngl if i wasnt completely infatuated with vin i would prob have a crush on him

skarapace: emIRAUIRHFDJK

smol boi: thank you emira, im sure that if i was into bean polls i would love you too :D

ededdndeddy: jdfhslk rekt

Panic! at the gender: hjlKJLHFD GUS

smol boi: im sorry viney i wasnt trying to overstep i just wanted to banter a little

Panic! at the gender: nonono u sweet child u did nothin wrong

badboi: eyyy amity ur part of the boi gang >:D

babyboi: oh cool

smol boi: yeah :D

fidget spinner: while this is v cute nd all

fidget spinner: amity why r u feelin like shit?

babyboi: its fine some people were harassing me about using he/them pronouns and one of them made a derogatory remark about you being trans and i lost it

babyboi: i ended up punching two of them before someone stepped in and now i dont know if they’re gonna press charges on me or not

fidget spinner: amity ur literally studying pre law ull be fine

fidget spinner: nd besides they provoked u im sure thatll hold up well if they try anything

babyboi: thank you boscha

fidget spinner: but damn mittens i didnt know u were out here defending my honor

babyboi: no one deserves to be called the terms they called you. and boscha i’m your friend first and foremost so of course id defend you

fidget spinner: aw shucks

fidget spinner: keep that up and i might blush

skarapace: smh

skarapace: rly babe?

best girl: what boscha is trying to say is thank you amity

babyboi: oh, no problem

fidget spinner: mhm yea thanks dude rly

fidget spinner: havent dealt with terfs in a loooong time

fidget spinner: my bad bitch image scares them away >;b

badboi: amity next time u hear theses ppl call me, i wanna beat them up >:0

babyboi: i will luz dw

badboi: good

smol boi: willow why is the side of your neck red?

best girl: mosquito

cantseeme: @fidget spinner listen when we’re talkin about you

fidget spinner: what can i say

fidget spinner: i dont have much self control

ededdndeddy: ah so it rly is the quiet ones who r into thAT

fidget spinner: dont say that ed

best girl: thank u boscha

fidget spinner: but yes ;)

best girl: im gonna get u

fidget spinner: if I dont move the cis wont see me

best girl: no more cuddles for you

fidget spinner: eh i still have kisses

best girl: no kisses either

fidget spinner: whAT

fidget spinner: wait i have skara tho

skarapace: no cuddles or kisses for either of you

fidget spinner: we’ll see how long that lasts cutie

ededdndeddy: ew cute lesbninis

ededdndeddy: well not lesbians but u get it

best girl: tragically

badboi: you guys are cute

badboi: hey boscha remember when i asked if you were dating willow and you said it would never happen?

fidget spinner: luz pls

badboi: remember when i asked if this was a poly thing and you said it would never happen :)

fidget spinner: pLS

ededdndeddy: luz throwing shade?

ededdndeddy: its more likely than you think

badboi: now

badboi: wanna tell me more about bo ;)

simp: jhsdlfkgshilufjka

fidget spinner: this is the lowest point we've ever reached

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay turns out my memory is workin for once nd I can actually remember what I wrote before
> 
> anygays feed me with comments nd kudos pls ;-;


	10. Boscha show some restraint pls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> babyboi: I would like to take a moment for u all to plan an intervention for boscha about her issues
> 
> fidget spinner: sir this is a mcdonald’s drive-thru

**[10:12 am]**

**[{disaster gays and where to find them}]**

Boscha: i will now be smart and decide not to take my meds anymore :D

Amity: boscha dont

Boscha: you cant stop me :DD

Amity: bet

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

babyboi: I would like to take a moment for u all to plan an intervention for boscha about her issues

fidget spinner: sir this is a mcdonald’s drive-thru

best girl: what happened?

babyboi: boscha decided not to take her pills anymore

best girl: boscha no

fidget spinner: but guys i feel great :D

skarapace: do i need to remind you what happened the last time you felt ‘great’

fidget spinner: i-

babyboi: last time this happened you didnt take your meds and you felt ‘great’ for exactly two hours before crashing and downing as much alcohol as possible until you collapsed for a good five hours

babyboi: we had to take you to your therapist and she gave you even more prescriptions than before so please boscha, keep taking your pills.

fidget spinner: :0

fidget spinner: oh

best girl: boscha please

fidget spinner: okie

badboi: sry wat happened? I was watching pretty little liars

fidget spinner: oooo

fidget spinner: what season?

badboi: 3

badboi: spencer and toby r so hot I literally can’t asdFGHJKl

fidget spinner: ugh bisexuals /lh

cantseeme: lmao have u seen spencer?

fidget spinner: im not disagreeing with the spencer thing

babyboi: okay but consider this

babyboi: shay mitchell

badboi: u right

fidget spinner: i see ur type am

fidget spinner: u like dem dark-skinned girls huh

Panic! at the gender: i was gonna comment on how that may seem racist but ur not yt boscha so nvm

fidget spinner: shit i didnt mean it like that

fidget spinner: ive just realized that besides willow amity has only crushed on girls with darker skin

badboi: but? bo doesnt have dark skin

babyboi: …

ededdndeddy: jhdskfAESDGFSOIKL

cantseeme: i foRGOT ABOUT THAT

fidget spinner: pLSDKJFLDFGHG

fidget spinner: IM CRYING

best girl: gus sent me this nd im cryien

best girl: pls watch  [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c5DoqH3wMiw ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c5DoqH3wMiw)

fidget spinner:  **y͆** ̡̛͖͎̯͚̺͊͊͘ **O͍̮͖̯̺͇̺̹̗̟̐̐͌̔̉̍̀̍U̟͇͔̽̋͆̇̽̉̌͢͞ͅ T̤̎̓̿͂̒́** ̧̢͚̘͢ **H̘̭̯̝̠̜̫̀̉̾̈̓̃i̴̡̫̗̤̙̼̫͔̝̋̇̂̐͗͗̓͡ͅN͇͇̹̤̰̐̍̈̉̒̔̉̆͑͑** ̷͙̞ **k̈̄̾** ̶̦͇̘̝̣͎͛͌̈́̾͝ **Î̬̪̪͑̃̓̂̚̚̚͠͞** ͚̥͜ **K̖̺̜̙͑͋͗͑͜** ̶͚͚̫̖͜ **N͓̞̓͊̊̅̅͞** ̷͚̳͔ **ǫ̩̫̺̲̺̜̯͈̈́̆̌̋͢W͈͕͓̱̱͇̘̖̃͌̾̌̾̍͆͞͞ Ẅ̴̬̥̟̯̼̹͌̎́̑͢H̡̢͎̟̲̯̤͓̭́̈̃͠͡** ͚ **a** ̷̠͖̬̜͍͉̼͛̄̍̌̆̃̊̚͜͢ **T̢̝̤̗̱̩͖̱̊̂̉̓͆̕͜ͅ A̢͖̘̭̳͐̌̈̈͋̚̕͢ P̶͇̜̞̘͕̥̓̏͊̽̒̒́̉͂͊͢͢a̶̛̲͔̟͕̱̅͗̃͐̉̅Ṅ̈** ̵̖̼͕̪̖̩̝̣͘͢ **Ị̖̼͈̠͇̃̍̋͑̊̏͜ņ̸͉͍͕͉͇͉̆̾͊͑̓̀̄̓͠İ̄** ̷̧̨̣̲̤̭͍̯͛̈́̀̌͝͡ **İ̸̖̳̱͍̠̻̥͎̉̓̕Ŝ̟̇͌́͐** ̨͙͇͉̪͓̥͈͟ **?̷̧̛̮̲̗̗̖͍͖̋͋̕**

skarapace: wHY ArE You BUYinG clOTHeS aT The SOuP StoRE?

babyboi: pLS tHEy’LL TakE My wiFe IF I dON’T brING TheM bURGer

Panic! at the gender: you people are a menace

ededdndeddy: C O M P O U N D

cantseeme: lmao imagine ordering a fucking burger at Starbucks

best girl: can i get a mcfukin uuuuUUUUUH

best girl: buRGER

fidget spinner: we dont sell burgers here sir we have paninis and breakfast sandwiches

best girl: wdyM YOU DONT SELL-

badboi: cAN I gEt a BURgeR EXtrA DIP

cantseeme: uuuuh thank u for that gus

smol boi: no problem :D

ededdndeddy: do we got any other words of wisdom?

best girl: being short is okay

badboi: if the sky falls tall ppl die first

babyboi: id hold up the sky myself so that you would live luz

badboi: aww thats sweet amity, now just use those lines on bo and ull be good

skarapace: wbu bosch?

best girl: would u do that for us?

fidget spinner: well heck

skarapace: :/

skarapace: whats the point of having a 6ft tall gf if im not gonna use it to my advantage?

babyboi: im never gonna forgive u for growing two inches taller than me boscha

fidget spinner: help

best girl: wait a minute

best girl: wHO ATE ALL THE CABBAGES IN THE PANTRY?

cantseeme: wasnt there like a shit tone just yesterday?

best girl: Y E S ?

skarapace: it was me

best girl: babe w h y ?

skarapace: me like the C R O N C H

badboi: oh so u have the zebra instinct too

fidget spinner: the fucking w h a t

ededdndeddy: ž ë b r ã

badboi: u know when you just want the crunch and eat a lot without realizing

babyboi: thats

babyboi: thats called a craving luz

badboi: oh

fidget spinner: Ž Ë B R Ã Ï Ń S T Ī N Ć T

Panic! at the gender: there isnt a single working brain cell in this group of people

Panic! at the gender: except me and occasionally willow

best girl: occasionally?

Panic! at the gender: i mean you’re dating boscha aND skara now so idk what thats gonna do to your braincell count

best girl: fair

babyboi: dont i count?

fidget spinner: hAH NO

babyboi: …

skarapace: lmao imagine

cantseeme: mittens with the braincells?

ededdndeddy: not as long as girls exist lmao

babyboi: ...

babyboi: im coming for your shins

**[babyboi went idle]**

fidget spinner: wAIT WAITUROIFJD

skarapace: NONOENFDSUIKA AMIERUYT

cantseeme: hLEP

ededdndeddy: RUN

badboi: o//o

best girl: luz wh-

Panic! at the gender: amity ran past her so

best girl: ah

fidget spinner: O MY FUK AMIDU

skarapace: bOSCHA RUN DAMMIT

fidget spinner: bUMTRIGUFD

skarapace: BABE RUN QUICK

fidget spinner: OKAYYYDUSYFAI

**[1:12 pm]**

best girl: so

best girl: what happened?

Panic! at the gender: a lot i dont even know if u want me to explain

best girl: do it anyways

Panic! at the gender: okay so

Panic! at the gender: amity went to chase the others and so far emira is lying somewhere in the library, edric is stuck in the gym shower, skara is floating in the pool fsr? I think amity pushed her in and luz is still in a bi panic after seeing feral!amity

best girl: and boscha?

Panic! at the gender: amity chased her for awhile but then boscha got a water gun and started chasing amity while spraying him with water and yelling ‘oH ALlaH pLeaSE CLeanSE ThIS HeATheN oF THE hARaM THEY haVE COMMittED!!’

Panic! at the gender: but amity got a nerf gun at some point and he went after boscha so now they’re both camped out in the science room shooting water and darts at eachother

best girl: …

best girl: im gonna go help skara

Panic! at the gender: smart

**[2:38 pm]**

fidget spinner: okay so like

fidget spinner: me nd amity r stuck in the elevator on the second floor so help?

cantseeme: thE ELEVATOR?

babyboi: yeah we are stuck in it

best girl: ill tell the maintenance staff wait

skarapace: you hanging in there guys?

babyboi: i suppose so

fidget spinner: the elevator is hella creaky thought

babyboi: but what is humanity but a passenger on a creaky unstable elevator that might kill us at any moment?

skarapace: I hate that I fully understood that

ededdndeddy: I don’t need to have an existential crisis right now mittens

babyboi: and i didn’t need to be vored by an elevator today yet here I am

badboi: vORED BY AN ELEVATROLASHFKDJGAMITY

skarapace: imma go save bosch

Panic! at the gender: wait no

cantseeme: W A I T Y E S

badboi: @best girl control ur gfs

best girl: control urs first

badboi: i dont have a gf but im assuming you mean amity and as you can see he’s behaving so :/

best girl: fair

Panic! at the gender: anD THAT’S ALL YOU CAN DO TO HELP???

best girl: yes????

Panic! at the gender: …

Panic! at the gender: I'm leaving

cantseeme: o fuk I cant believe uv don this

ededdndeddy: sucks to suck

fidget spinner: lmao skate fast eat grass smoke ass

skarapace: wait wait waitwaitwaitwaitwait

ededdndeddy: Eat GRaSS smOKe AsS?

fidget spinneer: wait no

ededdndeddy: lmao how r u gonna smoke ass dude?

fidget spinner: ill experiment on u if u cant keep ur mouth shut binch

best girl: Boscha no

fidget spinner: :/

best girl: :|

fidget spinner: ://

best girl: >:|

fidget spinner: ,’:/

fidget spinner: okie willow

cantseeme: this will never cease to amaze me

fidget spinner: listen here

best girl: boscha

best girl: no

fidget spinner: fiiiiine

skarapace: ur hot when u command authority willow

ededdndeddy: smh gays

fidget spinner: can someone help?

fidget spinner: the elevator is rly creaky nd amity just fell asleep

ededdndeddy: ?

fidget spinner: idk he’s leaning against the wall nd sleepin

badboi: aww can u get a pic

fidget spinner: hmhm sure thing luz ;)

best girl: im gonna go to pizza hut skara? boscha? do u wanna come?

skarapace: ofc babe

fidget spinner: pls im still in the elevator

fidget spinner: ;-;

skarapace: we’ll save u some slices from the hawaiian pizza

best girl: and we’ll get you a pepsi

fidget spinner: ily babes ;-;

ededdndeddy: ew hawaian

fidget spinner: wtf did you just say you tell bean stalk?

Panic! at the gender: pls not again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aha mORE fukery
> 
> feel free to comment or leave kudos ofc :D


	11. Prank wars part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> badboi: you saw nothing
> 
> skarapace: i dont exist
> 
> best girl: i do not see

**[7:12 am]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

Panic! at the gender: the dorms are all empty, did u all go to class early?

fidget spinner: yes :b

best girl: ofc viney :))

cantseeme: mhm babe >:D

ededdndeddy: didnt expect that did u >:)

smol boi: always viney :DD

badboi: yeee :)

babyboi: affirmative

skarapace: lmao obvi ,’:)

Panic! at the gender: huh

cantseeme: are u doubting us babe ;)

Panic! at the gender: im just surprised

ededdndeddy: better get to class now slacker

Panic! at the gender: smh

**[9:12 am]**

Panic! at the gender: where are you all?

fidget spinner: at the gym

fidget spinner: to get stronk

Panic! at the gender: all of you?

best girl: yes :)

cantseeme: yee babe >:)

ededdndeddy: hell yea >:D

smol boi: yes :DD

badboi: yep :))

babyboi: positive

skarapace: ofc vin ,’:)

Panic! at the gender: hmm

Panic! at the gender: well thats nice i guess

ededdndeddy: very

**[11:38 am]**

Panic! at the gender: whO LEFT A BUCKET OF PAINT ON THE DORM ROOM?

badboi: shit

cantseeme: hEY I TOLD YOU FUKERS THAT VIN WWAS OFF LIMITS

badboi: im sorryyy ;-;

babyboi: leave luz alone shes sorry

Panic! at the gender: WDYM OFF LIMITS?

Panic! at the gender: EMIRA EXPLAIN RIGHT NOW

cantseeme: gotta gay :D

badboi: gotta bi :D

babyboi: bye

**[cantseeme, badboi and babyboi went idle]**

Panic! at the gender: ffs

**[12:00 am]**

**[{disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Emira removed Viney from {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

Emira: I need help

Amity: if u need help hiding a body im ready

Boscha: …

Emira: thats probably the most supportive thing you’ve ever said on this chat or to me

Amity: if I killed u all now u wouldn’t be able to spread that information

Edric: ffs

Edric: we get it

Edric: ur a top smh

Boscha: lmao yeah

Amity: hdlufigsjhiudih

Edric: a disaster top tho (to the ppl who know my twt hah u get it)

Emira: problematic statement but

Emira: the tops r losers

Emira: there just trying to prove something to their dads

Boscha: i mean *gestures towards amity*

Amity: fuk you

Boscha: im gonna have to say no to that sweetie ur not my type

Amity: thats not what i meant

Boscha: eh

Emira: viney knows

Boscha: about the p word

Emira: im sure that she knows

Boscha: well im not the one who put the paint on the door so =_=

Emira: well i can assure u that willow nd skara will get revenge for the toaster prank

Boscha: they’re free to try

Boscha: im ready

Emira: famous last words

Boscha: fuk u

**[12:38 am]**

**[{the gays on the third floor}]**

Panic! at the gender: im not gonna ask what was up with the paint thing

Panic! at the gender: but why did i just hear a yell from the kitchen?

cantseeme: from who’s dorm?

Panic! at the gender: boscha, amity and skaras

ededdndeddy: o dw boscha just started a small fire

Panic! at the gender: she started a wHAT

ededdndeddy: a fire

ededdndeddy: skara said something to her and apparently she accidentally dropped water on the still hot stove which caused a fire to erupt from it

Panic! at the gender: I-

cantseeme: what the fuck could skara have said that would have made you set the stove on f i r e

fidget spinner: uh

fidget spinner: i was beating some eggs and she wrapped her arms around my waist nd told me ‘will u beat me as hard as u beat those eggs daddy?’ and I panicked

badboi: KSADGHHJLSLDKHJ SKARA WYGEUDHJK

skarapace: she deserves it for the prank she pulled

cantseeeme: okay but why did u call her daddy specifically

skarapace: none of ur business

cantseeme: oop

ededdndeddy: damn bosch

ededdndeddy: u let ur gfs push u around like that?

ededdndeddy: kinky

fidget spinner: just stop

cantseeme: I’m asking you to cease what you’re doing right now

badboi: I’m demanding with an embarrassed intonation for the cessation of the actions that you’re doing in that instant because it irritates me

ededdndeddy: due to you overwhelming my patience limit, I am telling, while emphasizing on the embarrassment that it causes me, that I would highly appreciate if everyone in this collective discussion could decide by common accord to leave off the type of conversation we were having in that last moment to return to subjects that pleases me more since this one provokes in my brain a chemical reaction leading to me feeling irritation and embarrassment

fidget spinner: I don’t appreciate this slander

fidget spinner: ill get my revenge skara

skarapace: im counting on it babe ;)

Panic! at the gender: wait prank?

fidget spinner: gotta gay :D

Panic! at the gender: wait no

**[fidget spinner went idle]**

skarapace: hah bye :D

**[skarapace went idle]**

Panic! at the gender: i-

**[1:12 pm]**

skarapace: ur such a dick boscha

fidget spinner: i know so suck me

babyboi: wh-

best girl: girls not here pls

cantseeme: wdYM NOT HERE IMSDFKJGK

ededdndeddy: wait what happened

skarapace: :/

badboi: im afraid to know now

cantseeme: tell it

ededdndeddy: tell it

cantseeme: tell it

cantseeme: tell it

cantseeme: tell it

cantseeme: tell it

cantseeme: tell it

cantseeme: tell it

cantseeme: tell it

skarapace: geez okay fine

skarapace: boscha sent me some very

skarapace:  _ risqué _ pics of herself while i was in class :/

ededdndeddy: define resque

skarapace: y’avait pas de vetement

ededdndeddy: ooooo

ededdndeddy: did u enjoy it?

skarapace: irrelevant

best girl: send them to me

cantseeme: i-

fidget spinner: wAIT SKARA NO

best girl: o my

fidget spinner: WILLOW PLS

best girl: im

best girl: uh

skarapace: hot right?

best girl: yes

fidget spinner: WAIODFJGHKLD

ededdndeddy: horny bitches istg

babyboi: as ed would usually say

babyboi: there are dms for a reason

fidget spinner: shut up simp

babyboi: okay then

Panic! at the gender: can someone please explain these pranks?

cantseeme: gotta blast

ededdndeddy: byeeee

badboi: you saw nothing

skarapace: i dont exist

best girl: i do not see

fidget spinner: if i dont move u wont see me

babyboi: disengaging

Panic! at the gender: wtf

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> feed me with kudos nd comments cause next weeks is my last finals week so I'm struggling ;-;


	12. Prank wars part 2 but not really

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> smol boi: adding ‘lmao’ after saying something depressing doesnt make it less worrying boscha

**[9:12 am]**

**[{ooo baby a triple}]**

feral gf: willow

feral gf: willow

feral gf: willow

feral gf: willow

feral gf: willow

feral gf: willow

feral gf: willow

feral gf: willow

feral gf: skara

feral gf: skara

feral gf: skara

feral gf: skara

feral gf: skara

feral gf: babe

feral gf: babe

feral gf: babes

feral gf: baBES

artistic gf: dAMMIT BOSCHA WHAT IS IT?

feral gf: hi :D

feral gf: do you think pigeons have feelings

artistic gf: no

feral gf: guess ull find out

artistic gf: wh-

feral gf: check the fridge babe :)

artistic gf: um okay?

artistic gf: BOSCH AWETFDG

feral gf: yesh sweet girlfriend of mine :D

artistic gf: dID YOU SERIOUSLY PUT A PIGEON IN THE FRIDGE?

feral gf: yeee :D

artistic gf: i will get you for this mark my words

feral gf: m counting on it babe do ur worst ;)

artistic gf: …

artistic gf: are you enjoying this?

feral gf: m a y b e

smart gf: can you two not do this now? We have a lunch date and id rather no have you two be mad at each other

artistic gf: okay so new rule

artistic gf: no pranks while we’re on a date

feral gf: works for me

smart gf: thank you both of you

feral gf: awww anything for my little rosebud :D

artistic gf: which one?

feral gf: wdym which one?

smart gf: no bad skara bad

artistic gf: hAHAHA

artistic gf: i didnt mean anything dw about it

feral gf: why does no one ever explain anything to me

artistic gf: fml how is it that u can say the most stupid nd innocent shit nd still come off as charming

feral gf: u think im charming :D

artistic gf: …

artistic gf: ur just fishing for compliments huh

feral gf: ily skara :D

artistic gf: smh ilyt i guess

**[smart gf changed feral gf to charming gf]**

charming gf: i love u willow :D

smart gf: and i love you very much as well boscha

artistic gf: why r u being affectionate tho? did u drink corn syrup again?

artistic gf: or did u have a weed brownie?

charming gf: i just rly love u guys ;-;

artistic gf: sounds sus

charming gf: jUST LET ME LOVE YOU DAMMIT

smart gf: i throw myself at the mercy of the court

charming gf: good >:)

artistic gf: help

**[1:14 pm]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

fidget spinner: hah amity i thought u said u nd luz were working? why r u not working then >:DD

babyboi: yes me and luz are taking a break from our immigration project

babyboi: we’re really hitting a wall

fidget spinner: eye-

skarapace: …

badboi: hJHSBDKFSH

badboi: good one amity XD

fidget spinner: help wtf

ededdndeddy: guys come to my dorm we’re having a party

fidget spinner: rly?

ededdndeddy: ye

badboi: ill go :D

babyboi: ill go too

fidget spinner: ofc ull go

fidget spinner: if luz goes

babyboi: shut

skarapace: okay willow is coming too shes just finishing some work

cantseeme: do we got some games?

ededdndeddy: u should know that all the games I have are here to break up relationships

fidget spinner: its fine skara basically roasts me every day

skarapace: I will neither confirm nor deny those allegations

cantseeme: fuk we know we were there when skara dragged your outfit choice yesterday what did she say anyway?

babyboi: something along the lines of ‘you look like a buff football player who’s the reason why the punching bag at the gym is always broken and has probably stuck their dick in burning hot water at least once’

fidget spinner: jokes on u cause ive done it twice

ededdndeddy: boSCHAWTF

badboi: HJDFKSUIJOFUH WHEUYFDH

Panic! at the gender: r u serious

fidget spinner: maybe

cantseeme: say sike rn

fidget spinner: no

best girl: boscha

best girl: honey

best girl: did you seriously do that?

fidget spinner: willow ur adorable

skarapace: i second that statement

fidget spinner: sometimes istg shes the only thing keeping me from killing myself lmao

smol boi: adding ‘lmao’ after saying something depressing doesnt make it less worrying boscha

fidget spinner: whatever

Panic! at the gender: can we move back to the part where boscha said she stuck her dik in boiling water? tWICE?!??!!?

ededdndeddy: oh yeah, how did it feel bosch?

fidget spinner: it hurted

ededdndeddy: ide like to feel something again

best girl: boscha did you seriously do that?

fidget spinner: yes but

fidget spinner: in my defense

babyboi: tHERE IS NO DEFENCE BOSCHA WHAT YOU DID WAS EXTREMELY DANGEROUS AND STUPID

fidget spinner: listen

babyboi: AND THE FACT THAT YOU DID THAT NOT ONCE BUT TWICE IS TRULY ASTOUNDING

badboi: amity please

babyboi: noo luz

babyboi: boscha why did you do that?

fidget spinner: um

fidget spinner: ill dm you amity

babyboi: huh?

best girl: yea boscha told us and its something private

babyboi: im sorry boscha i shouldnt have yelled

fidget spinner: eh dw about it

fidget spinner: dysphoria just went brr

cantseeme: i don’t know who did this

cantseeme: but someone finished all of my sour cream and I need to know how did it

fidget spinner: we have sour cream?

skarapace: huh?

best girl: where did u put it?

cantseeme: I usually leave it in the old milk bottle

babyboi: wait

babyboi: so the milk ive been drinking for over a month was sour cream?

ededdndeddy: HJDSFULIKSGJF

cantseeme: why mittens?

babyboi: I thought the milk tasted strange

babyboi: ive been living a lie

badboi: just one? Ive been living like ten

smol boi: are you two okay

badboi: ye

babyboi: sure

ededdndeddy: i still cant believe willow singlehandedly stopped our prank war

skarapace: she has a good heart

ededdndeddy: yeah ive seen u staring at her...heart

fidget spinner: oh ur insulting my gf? u wanna go bitch?

Panic! at the gender: can we just revisit the fact that amity ate sour cream thinking it was milk for a whole month?

babyboi: I usually think things through

skarapace: mittens, sweetie I once saw u eat a marshmallow that was on fire

ededdndeddy: ah yes the dumbass energy I came to collect

babyboi: stop

fidget spinner: he isn’t stupid I guess

skarapace: proof?

fidget spinner: they aced all of their exams and I mean all of them

smol boi: boscha, amity asked me if soap had calories last week

babyboi: gUS

fidget spinner: as usual rip amity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> boscha is literally me pls send help


	13. We hold power right?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ededdndeddy: what a great team
> 
> ededdndeddy: someone who doesnt believe in ghosts, a skeptic, a precious cinnamon roll and someone who doesnt believe in the supernatural
> 
> fidget spinner: :)

**[12:42 pm]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

fidget spinner: did yall know that amity had a crush on nala when he was a kid?

babyboi: BOSCHA WTEFUSGHDJ

fidget spinner: eh

fidget spinner: fuking furry

babyboi: THAT WAS TAKEN COMPLETLY OUT OF CONTXET BOSCHA

fidget spinner: too bad

badboi: hey i found bleach under the sink

babyboi: good give them to me i need to purge my existence from this plane

fidget spinner: bet

skarapace: yall ready for bleach shots?

badboi: bET

best girl: If any of u touch the bleach I will bite ur fat cankles until they bleed out fucking pussy juice

fidget spinner: …

skarapace: ...

badboi: eye-

ededdndeddy: thoughts bosch? skara?

skarapace: hot

fidget spinner: ^

cantseeme: yup there it is

Panic! at the gender: why were you going to drink bleach?

babyboi: i think they were all dropped on the head as children

skarapace: who would like to do the honors?

fidget spinner: me

ededdndeddy: go for it bosch

fidget spinner: *clears throat*

fidget spinner: bold of you to assume we were even held

babyboi: i-

Panic! at the gender: ...

cantseeme: nOw tHAT’S A Lot oF DAmAGE

best girl: guys

best girl: lets not be this depressing this late at night

fidget spinner: anyone wanna summon bloody mary?

skarapace: its literally 1 am bosch

fidget spinner: exactly

badboi: im down

babyboi: ill join too

ededdndeddy: what a great team

ededdndeddy: someone who doesnt believe in ghosts, a skeptic, a precious cinnamon roll and someone who doesnt believe in the supernatural

fidget spinner: :)

ededdndeddy: ive come to the conclusion that we can all be summed up in one sentence

badboi: hit us with it

ededdndeddy: aight

ededdndeddy: mittens is gay disaster who’s straight a’s are the only straight thing about them

fidget spinner: accurate

babyboi: shut

ededdndeddy: bosch is dang girl how come god let u have two gfs?

fidget spinner: ;) its a gift

cantseeme: smh

ededdndeddy: viney is how did i even get here? oh yea its my gfs fault

cantseeme: guilty

ededdndeddy: willow is ofc best girl

fidget spinner: damn right she is

skarapace: yea >:D

ededdndeddy: skara is i simp for only two(2) women

fidget spinner: ;)

skarapace: yesh only for my gfs do i simp

best girl: aww skara

skarapace: i am but a simp who wants to appreciate her gfs

babyboi: before this goes any further please continue in the dms

fidget spinner: lmao

ededdndeddy: anygays

ededdndeddy: emira nd me r the best twins obvi

cantseeme: eyyyyy

ededdndeddy: eyyyyyyy

ededdndeddy: gus is precious smol boi

ededdndeddy: i think hes sleeping actually

ededdndeddy: anyways luz is bi afro-latina who can 100% kick anyones ass if she wanted to

badboi: stronk i am >:D

cantseeme: trust me amity is well aware of that fact

babyboi: shut up emira

badboi: aww dw amity you’re rly stronk too :DD

ededdndeddy: yea ive seen u starin at amity at the gym luz

ededdndeddy: care to explain why?

badboi: amity has a nice body edric

badboi: also watching their muscles move is interesting

cantseeme: @babyboi stop paniking

babyboi: im not

cantseeme: press x to doubt

ededdndeddy: x

best girl: x

skarapace: x

smol boi: x

Panic! at the gender: x

fidget spinner: xxxx

babyboi: leave me alone

cantseeme: i am asking you to move away from me

fidget spinner: i am asking with an embarrassed tone that you vacate this area immediately

Panic! at the gender: i am stating with an extremely embarrassed intonation that I would appreciate it greatly if you decided to perhaps remove your entire being from my peripheral vision because it seems to be bringing me extreme embarrassment in this moment

babyboi: …

skarapace: ive never seen viney type out that much just to drag someone

fidget spinner: u brought it out of her am, be proud

babyboi: i hate you all

fidget spinner: unoriginal

best girl: go to sleep all of you

badboi: okie willow

fidget spinner: but babe

best girl: sleep

fidget spinner: ugh

fidget spinner: whatever

skarapace: kay willow

best girl: you can have kisses skara, boscha ur in time out

fidget spinner: wdym time out?

best girl: i guess you’ll find out soon

fidget spinner: …

fidget spinner: im afraid

**[10:12 am]**

skarapace: ed why

ededdndeddy: no

skarapace: ED PLS WHY

badboi: wut happened?

skarapace: ed left my mug in the teachers lounge nd now i cant go get it

babyboi: am i correct in assuming that this is the same mug that boscha gave you for your birthday

skarapace: yes

babyboi: hmm

fidget spinner: dw babe ill go get it back

fidget spinner: luz amity lets go

badboi: yeee >:DD

fidget spinner: love the enthusiasm

babyboi: fine im coming too

fidget spinner: lets go gays

badboi: *bi

fidget spinner: uuuuuh

fidget spinner: lets go queers

ededdndeddy: the teachers lounge is a sacred place for teachers

ededdndeddy: they’re never gonna get in

best girl: dont underestimate boscha

ededdndeddy: eh

**[10:20 am]**

fidget spinner: hey babe i got ur mug

skarapace: ily bosch

fidget spinner: dang does ur girlfriend know about this?

skarapace: boscha pls

fidget spinner: lmao im kidding

ededdndeddy: wAIT HOW DID U GET IN?

babyboi: we went into the teachers lounge and one of the teachers told us to get out and boscha said ‘I’m muslim, amity is gay and luz is bi so kicking us out would be a hate crime’

babyboi: after that we got the mug and left

ededdndeddy: …

cantseeme: a legend honestly

cantseeme: booscha ur an icon

fidget spinner: o honey i know

best girl: and oh so modest

fidget spinner: ofc flowers, i am the most modest person i know

best girl: mhm

fidget spinner: my power is immense

fidget spinner: and as someone once told me

fidget spinner: “With great power comes great big booty bitches”

Panic! at the gender: wait

babyboi: you really know exactly what to say to kill the mood huh?

fidget spinner: cant kill whats already dead but yea

fidget spinner: it’s one of my many talents

fidget spinner: besides being able to read a 200k fanfic in two hours

skarapace: my baby is so talented

best girl: she sure is

fidget spinner: i love you guys ;-;

ededdndeddy: i hate it here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeeeee one more day before my winter break starts :DD
> 
> hopefully ill be able to update more


	14. Well this is a complicated situation now is it?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amity: why
> 
> Boscha: because im pan and ready to land :D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw// some mention of suicide

**[1:12 am]**

**[{disaster gays and where to find them}]**

Boscha: hey im in town so like

Boscha: can yall send me an uber

Boscha: i don’t want to go anywhere but I’ll pay 500 bucks for it to run me over

Edric: im gonna talk to skara nd willow if u keep doing this shit

Boscha: imma go jump off a tower

Edric: im telling

Emira: do a flip

Amity: why

Boscha: because im pan and ready to land :D

Boscha: on the ground

Boscha: hard

Edric: im getting willow

Boscha: no wait

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

badboi: lesbiams what is ur midnight wisdom

cantseeme: be gay do crimes

babyboi: kiss women

fidget spinner: invest in silver

ededdndeddy: I know that bosch is pan but thats rly good wisdom so ill let it slide

ededdndeddy: also @best girl @skarapace ur girl is being mildly suicidal again

best girl: what did she do?

ededdndeddy: implied that she wanted a car to run her over nd stuff

fidget spinner: eDRICNUDFOKSJO

best girl: boscha can we talk please?

skarapace: boscha do u want some cuddles

fidget spinner: i dont wanna talk this is my issue to deal with

skarapace: boscha u dont need to handle this alone

fidget spinner: uuuuugh im fiiiiiiine

best girl: boscha seriously

best girl: we’re worried

fidget spinner: willow babe im fine rly

skarapace: ur clearly not

cantseeme: why am I invested in this?

ededdndeddy: lmao instead of investing in silver bosch should have invested in her relationship

babyboi: both of you shut up

ededdndeddy: just saying

ededdndeddy: u might wanna get some help bosch

best girl: EDRIC BLIGHT SHUT THE FUCK UP BEFORE I SHOVE MY SNEAKER SO FAR DOWN YOUR THROAT THAT YOU’LL TASTE THE SWEAT AND TEARS OF THE POOR CHINESE KID WHO MADE IT

ededdndeddy: im-

badboi: u cant just say stuff like that ed

ededdndeddy: eh i was just saying

skarapace: well u cant just tell someone to get help ed

ededdndeddy: guess not

ededdndeddy: sorry bosch /gen

fidget spinner: its fine

fidget spinner: i mean ur right

fidget spinner: but im already getting help nd as u can see nothing has changed

skarapace: boscha pls can u tell us more?

fidget spinner: i rly dont wanna

best girl: will you accept hugs and cuddles?

fidget spinner: …

fidget spinner: fine

**[fidget spinner went idle]**

best girl: skara get the covers we’re gonna have a movie night with boscha

skarapace: eye eye ma’am

**[best girl and skarapace went idle]**

babyboi: i hope boscha will be alright

cantseeme: shes strong mittens, she’ll be fine nd if she wants our help we’ll be here

cantseeme: now who wants to see me fit fifty marshmallows in my mouth

Panic! at the gender: babe please no

cantseeme: gotta gay

Panic! at the gender: eMIRA NO

**[9:12 am]**

**[{disaster gays and where to find them}]**

Amity: i have a problem

Edric: wazzit?

Boscha: sup?

Amity: are you okay boscha?

Boscha: yes im fine but this is about u

Boscha: so wassup?

Amity: luz has devised this plan to get me to ask bo out

Boscha: lmao i forgot about that

Emira: so how r u gonna get out of this one mittens?

Amity: uh

Amity: im gonna pretend to confess to bo so that luz would get off my back

Amity: ill tell bo about it nd she’ll say no to my fake confession nd boom

Amity: problem solved

Boscha: cant wait for this to inevitably blow up in ur face

Amity: shut up

**[Amity created a chat with Bo]**

Amity: hey bo?

Bo: hey amity

Bo: what can i do u for this time?

Amity: okay i have a problem

Bo: is this about ur crush on the new girl?

Amity: for the last time

Amity: i do not have a crush on luz

Bo: mhm whatever u say ami

Bo: now wat is it?

Amity: i may have accidentally told her a lie

Bo: that lie being?

Amity: that i have a crush on u

Bo: …

Bo: blight thats possibly the dumbest thing uv ever done

Amity: yes yes yes listen i need your help

Bo: with wat exactly dear fake crush of mine?

Amity: …

Amity: dont do that

Bo: ;b

Bo: okay but srsly how can i help

Amity: im gonna fake confess to you to get luz off my back okay?

Bo: rn?

Amity: yes

Bo: aight im in the darkroom so ill meet u outside then?

Amity: yes ill see you then

Amity: thank you bo

Bo: no prob

**[4:12 pm]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

fidget spinner: u know

fidget spinner: ive seen a lot of situations get fuked up

fidget spinner: hell ive cause a lot of situations to be fuked up

fidget spinner: but never in my 20 years of life have i seen someone fuk up that royaly

babyboi: boscha pls

badboi: well hey amity congratulations

Panic! at the gender: did i miss the memo?

ededdndeddy: ye wtf happened?

skarapace: well long story short

skarapace: amity now has a gf

ededdndeddy: o u and luz got together

badboi: hah no

badboi: amity deserves better than me

badboi: no they got with bo

ededdndeddy: i-

Panic! at the gender: …

smol boi: ,’:/

badboi: isnt that great :D

badboi: amity finally got with his crush

fidget spinner: i didnt know it was possible to achieve such obliviousness

babyboi: uhu

**[{untitled chat}]**

Amity: bO WHY DID YOU SAY YES?

Bo: isnt that what u wanted me to do?

Amity: NO YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO REJECT MY ADVANCES SO THAT LUZ WOULD ACCEPT THAT MY FAKE CRUSH IS GONE

Bo: o

Amity: YEAH O

Bo: i mean

Bo: at this point we can fake date

Amity: bo-

Bo: hear me out

Bo: lets fake date for a little then break up

Bo: itll make it seem more real to luz nd she’ll accept it

Amity: fine

Bo: sry amity rly

Bo: i didnt understand

Amity: its fine

Amity: i suppose this situation could work too

Bo: yeee

Amity: hmm

**[6:23 pm]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

**[fidget spinner added bo to {the gays of the third floor}]**

**[fidget spinner changed bo to tomato]**

**[fidget spinner changed babyboi to vegan]**

tomato: thanks for this spectacular welcome boscha

fidget spinner: i aim to please

vegan: why is this my name boscha

fidget spinner: cause vegans eat tomatoes

vegan: boscha WHAT THE HELL

tomato: hah nice one bosch

fidget spinner: at least ur gf understands my humor

vegan: i think she’s just scared of you

fidget spinner: why? im the least scary person here

skarapace: ofc babe

best girl: agreed

fidget spinner: sEE?

badboi: those are your gfs, they dont count

fidget spinner: hurt

ededdndeddy: i cant process this

ededdndeddy: imma go sleep

cantseeme: ugh same

cantseeme: nice going mittens

cantseeme: hdslfukj

vegan: ?

vegan: thanks?

tomato: cmon b a b e

tomato: let them have their fun

vegan: sure i guess

badboi: aww u two are so cute :D

tomato: hey luz, thx but hey we should totally hang out more

badboi: well if your gonna be dating amity then ye def

tomato: nice

**[11:48 pm]**

fidget spinner: i know none of u r awake but imma go inhale some gasoline now so peace

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> amity just keeps digging a deeper hole for himself huh?


	15. Get your shit together amity pls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emira: this is the worst and stupidest idea we’ve ever had

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes this is a shorter chapter ;-;
> 
> i prob wont be updating any of my fics much this week or next week cause I have uni apps to finish, sry guys

name reminder

Amity: vegan

Boscha: fidget spinner

Luz: badboi

Emira: cantseeme

Edric: ededdndeddy

Viney: Panic! at the gender

Willow: best girl

Skara: skarapace

Gus: smol boi

Bo: tomato

**[7:24 am]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

ededdndeddy: boscha wtf

skarapace: BOSCHA NO

vegan: wait wAIT BOSCHA WHERE ARE YOU

tomato: i-

fidget spinner: heyyyyyy gays

best girl: boscha honey where are you?

fidget spinner: why u trynna smash?

best girl: not while you’re in this state

fidget spinner: coward

skarapace: boscha where tf are u

fidget spinner: in ur dreams hopefully

skarapace: boscha

skarapace: tell me where you are now u dumbass

fidget spinner: ur hot when ur mad skaska

cantseeme: s k A S K A

skarapace: boscha where

fidget spinner: the garage

ededdndeddy: not to be that binch but why tf are you in the garage?

fidget spinner: gasoline

fidget spinner: i go sniff sniff

best girl: oh boscha

skarapace: u gay dumbass

fidget spinner: ur gay dumbass tho ;D

skarapace: smh yea i guess so

fidget spinner: >:0

vegan: can someone please go get boscha before she hurts herself?

fidget spinner: im stronk simp

fidget spinner: i can take care of myself

tomato: press x to doubt

fidget spinner: if any of u press x imma commit livnt

ededdndeddy: x

ededdndeddy: wAIT WAIUHGRFDJ BOSCHA SNDOFI

fidget spinner: hol up imma get the ‘game over’ screen for this game called lIFE

skarapace: BOSCHA NO

fidget spinner: bye bye

**[fidget spinner went idle]**

Panic! at the gender: shit

tomato: skara, willow, luz u guys go to the garage stat

tomato: amity ed nd em go to the drug store nd get some bandages, nose drops and aloe vera

cantseeme: aloe vera?

tomato: boscha likes aloe vera juice fsr

tomato: gus, ur gonna help me get boscha’s room ready okay? We want her to be comfy when she gets back

smol boi: yes bo :D

badboi: ur gf is rly hands on ami

vegan: i guess so

**[10:13 am]**

badboi: we’ve acquired boscha

ededdndeddy: took u long enough

badboi: she took her motorcycle so we had to chase her

cantseeme: sounds like her tbh

vegan: okay get her into her dorm rn

vegan: she needs rest

badboi: we’re getting her upstairs shes just kind of heavy

skarapace: she has a lot of muscle

skarapace: it adds weight

badboi: yea i figured

tomato: right just get her up to her room

tomato: then we’re just gonna let her rest okay? she needs to clear out her system a little before we do anything

badboi: ur gf is rly smart ami

vegan: mhm

tomato: aww thx luz

badboi: ofc bo :D

best girl: alright boscha has been successfully moved to the room

best girl: me and skara will deal with the rest

Panic! at the gender: gl guys

skarapace: thx vin

**[1:43 pm]**

**[{disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Edric added Bo to {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

Edric: okay first of all

Edric: how r u gonna get out of this situation mittens

Amity: huh?

Edric: the whole fake dating thing

Amity: ooh

Amity: bo how long should we wait before ‘breaking up’?

Bo: do it tom

Amity: i-

Amity: isnt that too early?

Bo: idk mate

Bo: dont u wanna just ask luz out or smth?

Bo: the longer u keep this charade up the more likely it is that luz is gonna find someone else to date

Amity: …

Amity: can i have a moment?

**[Amity went idle]**

Bo: was i too harsh?

Emira: honestly? Probably but mittens had to hear that

Emira: he’s so used to things eventually solving themselves but in this case, he cant just let this blow over

Bo: mhm still i feel bad

Bo: i mean

Bo: i cant imagine being in amity’s shoes

Edric: they’ll be fine

Edric: dw about him

Gus: everyone, would you like to play a quick game?

Edric: sure

Emira: yea

Emira: viney is in too

Bo: eh sure why not

Gus: good :)

Gus: meet us in the living room then

**[6:12 pm]**

Emira: this is the worst and stupidest idea we’ve ever had

Edric: r u backing out?

Emira: ofc not

Boscha: wat game

Emira: o ur alive

Boscha: yup

Boscha: now wats this game we’re gonna play?

Emira: the midnight game

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ive decided that luz nd amity will get together when I get a gf :)
> 
> yes its gonna be v e r y slow burn


	16. Be gay, slap racists

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bow: are you done being dramatic and gay or should i mute this?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cw// islamaphobia nd general racism at the start

Names

Amity: vegan

Boscha: fidget spinner

Luz: badboi

Emira: cantseeme

Edric: ededdndeddy

Viney: Panic! at the gender

Willow: best girl

Skara: skarapace

Gus: smol boi

Bo: tomato

**[7:12 pm]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

vegan: i cant believe you’re all doing this

fidget spinner: idk wat u expected

skarapace: im just surprised amity is joining us

vegan: someone needs to be there to fix your stupid mistakes

ededdndeddy: aww dont be like that mittens u know u love us :3

vegan: debatable

tomato: amity pls

vegan: whatever

fidget spinner: okay so like we’re playing this shit?

fidget spinner: shit wait

cantseeme: yes we’re playing today

ededdndeddy: shit u good dude?

badboi: okay i heard we’re playing the midnight game so i brought backup

badboi: i have holy water and salt

badboi: and a knife

ededdndeddy: i-

Panic! at the gender: yea sure bring weed while ur at it

ededdndeddy: bet

vegan: pls dont

cantseeme: eh surprise us ed

ededdndeddy: noice

fidget spinner: im gonna cut a bitch

skarapace: do tell babe

fidget spinner: i ran into some bitch on my way from my gi lecture nd she said some racist shit

vegan: elaborate

fidget spinner: she asked me if i was gonna become a terrorist like my parents and i wanted to fukin snap her neck like a toothpick

best girl: i wouldn’t have stopped you

fidget spinner: so someone told her that that was rude and racist and this fukin whore responds with ‘I can’t be racist bc im 1/16 native american’

badboi: gather the pitchforks we’re going on a crusade

ededdndeddy: heel yea

fidget spinner: ugh i hate ppl like her

fidget spinner: and then u know wat she said?

tomato: depending on wat she said i might get up nd go kick her ass rn

fidget spinner: prepare to kick someone's ass then

fidget spinner: she called me a sand n*****

tomato: hi wtf

cantseeme: yO WHAT THE ACTUAL FUK

vegan: we’re gonna go kill someone lets go

badboi: right behind you

fidget spinner: i already reported her

fidget spinner: no one says that shit ot me and gets away with it

skarapace: i still wanna beat her face >:/

fidget spinner: aww and i thought i was the feral gf

best girl: we can all be feral at times

cantseeme: that bitch better get worse than detention tho

cantseeme: that was a fuking racial slur

fidget spinner: me angy >:(

best girl: i think its safe to say we wont be playing the midnight game tonight

fidget spinner: we’re doing it tomorrow then

ededdndeddy: im adding it to my calendar

vegan: great

vegan: does anyone want to play assassins creed with me

skarapace: theres a multiplayer function for it?

vegan: yes

skarapace: huh

skarapace: yea im in lets go

vegan: cool

badboi: haha amity is a gaymer

vegan: …

fidget spinner: OwO

**[fidget spinner changed vegan to gaymer]**

gaymer: astounding

fidget spinner: ik right

tomato: now my name doesnt make sense

**[fidget spinner changed tomato to bow]**

bow: why did i even ask

fidget spinner: enjoy it

cantseeme: aight imma sleep so peace

Panic! at the gender: im guessing that means that ill be sleeping too then

cantseeme: got that right babe ;)

gaymer: im starting the game skara stop making heart eyes at boscha and come over here

skarapace: stfu im appreciating my gf

gaymer: yes well cmon the game waits for no one

skarapace: fml fine

badboi: okie well im gonna go write some of my fics so bye

gaymer: bye luz

badboi: gn amity :D

skarapace: now whos getting distracted?

gaymer: shut

fidget spinner: well maybe ur  _ gf _ can give u some words of encouragement before she goes to sleep

fidget spinner: @bow

bow: gn amity, dont stay up too late and kick the asses of whoever ur playing against

gaymer: goodnight bo

fidget spinner: ‘,:|

skarapace: works for me

fidget spinner: eh have fun i guess

**[10:13 pm]**

gaymer: boscha stop taking your shirt off i need skara to focus so that we wont die

fidget spinner: sucks to suck

gaymer: boscha pLS

fidget spinner: well skara shouldnt be looking when im just trynna change, this is my room too remember

skarapace: then tell u and ur abs to not change literally three meters away from me

fidget spinner: im not gonna sleep in a fukin turtleneck okay

skarapace: well wHAT DID U EXPECT ME TO DO WHEN UR HERE LOOKING LIKE A COMPLETE SPORTS MAGAZINE MODEL

fidget spinner: sAYS THE ONE WHO LITERALLY LOOKS LIKE A FUKING G O D D E S S

gaymer: i feel like i shouldnt be here

fidget spinner: would u rather we be screaming this out loud?

gaymer: no

skarapace: then stfu nd let me appreciate my gf

gaymer: …

gaymer: im switching off multiplayer and playing the story so bye skara

skarapace: >:0

fidget spinner: great ur free now cmere and kith me

skarapace: yesh

gaymer: egh, dont do it in front of me

fidget spinner: if i wanna kiss my gf here i will fuking kiss my gf here simp

gaymer: why tf are u still texting?

gaymer: aaand there they go

gaymer: great

gaymer: this is the lowest point of my life by far

gaymer: truly

gaymer: i suppose i should probably let them get to it

gaymer: wish i could do that with someone

gaymer: they really rent quiet huh

bow: are you done being dramatic and gay or should i mute this?

gaymer: …

cantseeme: rip mittens

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> amity continues to suffer
> 
> also i was called the thing that boscha was called irl nd all I wanna say is that its def not a pleasant experience :/


	17. Are they worried that they're gonna be playing the midnight game? ofc not

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> skarapace: me nd boscha where making tortillas
> 
> skarapace: and they look
> 
> fidget spinner: fINE

**[8:12 am]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

Panic! at the gender: why is the smoke alarm going off again?

fidget spinner: none of ur business

Panic! at the gender: im-

best girl: boscha…

fidget spinner: why hello o wonderful gf of mine how was ur night :D

best girl: it was good though i wish you could have come nd cuddled me but i suppose we cant get everything we want at times

best girl: now explain the fire alarm thing

fidget spinner: its nothing dw :D

best girl: …

best girl: boscha im coming in

fidget spinner: waIT NO

skarapace: WILLOW NO

best girl: >:|

gaymer: why did i wake up to this

fidget spinner: dw about it

best girl: boscha open up

fidget spinner: sorry i cant hear anything

best girl: skara

skarapace: do yall hear smth?

best girl: im coming in

fidget spinner: nO WAIT WIANURTIOJKD

Panic! at the gender: what happened?

best girl: boscha

best girl: i dont think its supposed to look like that

fidget spinner: ://

badboi: whats happenin

skarapace: me nd boscha where making tortillas

skarapace: and they look

fidget spinner: fINE

fidget spinner: they look completely fine

best girl: I think boscha overcooked it

fidget spinner: if u think its too brown then ur racist

best girl: …

best girl: boscha a tortilla isn’t supposed to be cooked to the point of it looking black

skarapace: now that’s racist

best girl: …

best girl: ;-;

fidget spinner: wAIT BABE NO

skarapace: CUTIE DONT CRY WE’RE SO SRY IT WAS A JOKE

skarapace: BOSCHA WTF

fidget spinner: I DIDNT MEAN TO MAKE HER CRY O MY FUK WILLOW IM SO SORRY

gaymer: this still amazes me

cantseeme: shhh let them be gay

gaymer: okay?

ededdndeddy: now that i think of it

ededdndeddy: how is it that we all knew that boscha had a crush on willow but not that skara had a crush on boscha?

skarapace: i was subtle

fidget spinner: she was subtle

Panic! at the gender: pffff

Panic! at the gender: suBTLE?

Panic! at the gender: YOU?

Panic! at the gender: SKARA THATS THE BIGGEST LIE YOUVE EVER TOLD EVER

Panic! at the gender: HSDUKFLJG

ededdndeddy: ive never seen them like this

ededdndeddy: tf did u do skara

skarapace: im? not? lying??

Panic! at the gender: bINCH

Panic! at the gender: REMEMBER THAT TIME YOU A C C I D E N T A L Y SENT BOSCHA NUDES?

skarapace: …

fidget spinner: but that was an accident

cantseeme: …

ededdndeddy: …

bow: …

smol boi: ://

Panic! at the gender: not surprised considering when it happened all u said was “oh haha skara you sent me a nude by mistake the other day, don't worry I deleted it, I saw nothing :D”

gaymer: wait srsly?

Panic! at the gender: yep

Panic! at the gender: i even got to hear skara saying ‘why is she so dumb’ when boscha left

fidget spinner: …

fidget spinner: wait so can u send the nude again tho

skarapace: wh y

fidget spinner: cause i actually deleted it as soon as i realized that it was from you so i didnt get to see it

skarapace: …

gaymer: who knew boscha’s actually a gentlewoman

badboi: amity be nice

gaymer: okay luz

ededdndeddy: speaking of oblivious idiots…

bow: amity

bow: we’re breaking up

gaymer: huh?

bow: you heard me

badboi: whAT WHY

bow: it just isnt working

gaymer: oh okay

bow: okay anygays we friends now

gaymer: cool

fidget spinner: …

smol boi: that was the most awkward conversation ive ever had to witness

ededdndeddy: even gus is done with ur bullshit

badboi: waitwaitiwait im so confused what just happened

fidget spinner: amity nd bo broke up

fidget spinner: obvi

badboi: …

badboi: wh-

**[Luz created a chat with Amity]**

Luz: amity are you okay

Amity: yea im fine why

Luz: well your gf just broke up with you so

Amity: eh im fine dw

Amity: me and bo are still friends so its fine

Luz: oh okay

Luz: but still if you want to vent or just want to talk about whatever im here okay?

Amity: yea

Amity: actually

Amity: luz would you like to go to ocean’s basket tomorrow? if we survive the midnight game

Luz: the sushi place? of course ami :D

Amity: cool, so ill pick you up tomorrow at 1pm?

Luz: its a date then ;)

**[Luz went idle]**

Amity: …

Amity: help

**[1:23 pm]**

**[{The gays of the third floor}]**

fidget spinner: okay so

fidget spinner: now that thats over with can we pls focus on the matter at hand

ededdndeddy: yo bosch

fidget spinner: wat?

ededdndeddy: are u afraid of the word choppiness

fidget spinner: why tf would I be afraid of that

ededdndeddy: it says chop penis

fidget spinner: well then are u afraid of it?

ededdndeddy: that wasnt the question

fidget spinner: sus

cantseeme: guysbusyduhfsidjfuygih

badboi: what happened?

cantseeme: okay so

cantseeme: boscha just called skara in class and the ring tone was deepthroat by cupcakke

cantseeme: deadass the teacher was doing roll call and suddenly everyone just heard ‘HUmP ME!!!' at like max volume

cantseeme: skara is so red i think she stopped functioning

cantseeme: its like that time she ate chicken and she got an allergic reaction

fidget spinner: damn you fried chickem for being fried chickem now im a widow

gaymer: wh-

skarapace: i did it on a dare

cantseeme: uhu

ededdndeddy: nono i can vouch for skara, she lost a bet to boscha

cantseeme: eye see

cantseeme: the teacHER LITERALLY JUST SIGHED AND ASSIGNED US AN ESSAY IM-

fidget spinner: i forgot we even have teachers in our classes

gaymer: thats? literally? the? point? of? a? university?

fidget spinner: still

fidget spinner: anygays have yall ever realized that we’re literally breathing tree fart

gaymer: i hope u are aware that i could have lived without that information

fidget spinner: gotta keep you on your toes blight

fidget spinner: also have u ever realized that ur arents could have ruined ur life by calling u aaaaAAAH

fidget spinner: just imagine being like “hey, how are you aAAHHH”

fidget spinner: wait thats actually pretty funny

fidget spinner: willow, skara lets name our kid that

best girl: uh

best girl: i dont think thats the right name to give a kid

skarapace: boSCHA UR A GENIUS

fidget spinner: i know babe ;)

gaymer: wat tf have i witnessed?

cantseeme: the social suicide of a child thats yet to be born

badboi: always a great time with u guys huh

Panic! at the gender: they aim to please

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the fried chimken line is smth one of my friends actually said in discord once
> 
> I dont even remember the context she just said it


	18. Boscha dont drink the bleach

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fidget spinner: well u know what they say
> 
> fidget spinner: a woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle
> 
> gaymer: …

**[2:00 pm]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

fidget spinner: guys wait

fidget spinner: havent yall realized that the closest things to unicorns on this earth are rhinos

best girl: boscha

best girl: sweetie

best girl: one of the loves of my life

fidget spinner: keep that up flowers and ill blush

best girl: ⅓ of the cuddle pile

best girl: in exactly ten(10) hours

best girl: we will all(?) be playing a game in which we risk having our organs ripped out

best girl: so babe please

best girl: refrain form making me think of unicorns right now

fidget spinner: okie babe

fidget spinner: anyways love you

ededdndeddy: stop being gay 2021100239

skarapace: ed u good?

ededdndeddy: yes

gaymer: i cannot describe how much doubt i have against that statement

ededdndeddy: go kiss luz u gay disaster

gaymer: eDRIC BLIGHT

fidget spinner: ur lucky luz is napping tbh :/

gaymer: i will murder you

cantseeme: and here we have mittens daily threat of murder folks, tune in tomorrow to see who is at the receiving end next time

gaymer: yes well dont you all have class

cantseeme: yes and?

gaymer: i dont know why i bother

cantseeme: yea me neither

skarapace: who tf is screeching outside?

fidget spinner: that would be amity

skarapace: ah so nothing new

**[3:12 pm]**

**[{luz is eminem confirmed}]**

Luz: current mood

Luz: power by little mix playing on repeat as i lay on the floor

Willow: sounds about right

Gus: luz your awake :D

Luz: hoi gus :D

Luz: and yes i have awoken

Luz: also did i read what happened in the main chat right?

Willow: which part?

Luz: ed saying that ami should kith me 😳

Willow: oh yea that

Willow: yes that did happen

Luz: so

Luz: i think amity may have a crush on me? but i could be wrong?

Willow: …

Willow: im done

Luz: wHY

Willow: how on eARTH ARE U STILL ASKING YOURSELF I F AMITY HAS A CRUSH ON YOU??

Willow: THAT GAY DISASTER HASNT EXACTLY EVER BEEN SUBTLE WITH HIS CRUSHES

Luz: …

Luz: are u saying that amity does have a crush on me?

Willow: …

Willow: bye

**[Willow went idle]**

Luz: gus pls

Gus: willow is right

Gus: good luck with asking amity out luz :D

**[Gus went idle]**

Luz: gUS PORTER

**[4:23 pm]**

**[{The gays of the third floor}]**

fidget spinner: word of advice

fidget spinner: dont drink bleach

gaymer: i-

gaymer: ISNT THAT A GIVEN?

fidget spinner: well i just had some and lemme tell u

fidget spinner: i would not recommend

gaymer: …

gaymer: @best girl @skarapace please help

badboi: what happened now

gaymer: boscha drank bleach

badboi: oh u poor thing, bleach tastes awful

gaymer: …

gaymer: why am i surrounded by iDIOTS

fidget spinner: awww cmon ami

gaymer: NO

gaymer: BOSCHA GO DRINK WATER RIGHT NOW

gaymer: THEN WE’RE TAKING YOU TO THE HOSPITAL

fidget spinner: ill be fine blight

fidget spinner: its not even burning anymore

best girl: bURNING

fidget spinner: im fine now i promise

fidget spinner: besides we need to play the midnight game tonight right

skarapace: …

cantseeme: ur gfs capability to act this blase about everything is astounding

fidget spinner: its part of my charm

best girl: boscha please

fidget spinner: im fine willow promise

fidget spinner: im fine

skarapace: bosch seriously

fidget spinner: guys ill be fine

fidget spinner: dw about me

gaymer: boscha

**[fidget spinner went idle]**

skarapace: shit

skarapace: im gonna go look for her

best girl: im coming with you skara

skarapace: meet u at the spot babe

**[skarapace and best girl went idle]**

cantseeme: wtf just happened?

gaymer: boscha may or may not die but she knows that if she does willow will def bring her back to life just to slap her

cantseeme: fair

**[5:18 pm]**

skarapace: okay crisis averted

skarapace: bosch is fine

skarapace: shes now baking

gaymer: hmm have fun

ededdndeddy: wait

Panic! at the gender: ur not gonna tell boscha not to bake?

gaymer: boscha is actually rly good at backing so eh

Panic! at the gender: well ill say

fidget spinner: guys

fidget spinner: u know when things mix together and dont look good?

badboi: haha me

fidget spinner: anyways i mixed the chocolate and chimken and it doesnt look good

badboi: boscha

badboi: what?

fidget spinner: the chicken and chocolate doesnt look good together

badboi: yea and i dont think itll taste good either

fidget spinner: ye of little faith noceda

cantseeme: faith isnt enough to save u now

fidget spinner: well u know what they say

fidget spinner: a woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle

gaymer: …

Panic! at the gender: while that statement is tru i fail to see the, oh what was the word again?

Panic! at the gender: reLEVANCE IN THIS CURRENT CONVERSATION IN WHICH YOU TOLD US THAT YOU MIXED C H O C O L A T E WITH C H I C K E N

fidget spinner: no need to yell im right here

gaymer: boscha

gaymer: why

fidget spinner: why not

bow: is it ready?

fidget spinner: yes?

bow: im coming down to ur dorm i wanna try it

badboi: bO NO

cantseeme: girl pls dont

gaymer: bo i wouldnt recommend that

bow: how bad can it be?

skarapace: its chocolate and chicken so im guessing pretty bad

bow: eh ive done worse

bow: ive fake dated amity

badboi: u wut

gaymer: BO

fidget spinner: im somehow not surprised this happened

bow: oh oops

gaymer: oOPS?

gaymer: OOPS?

gaymer: THIS IS NOT AN OOPS SITUATION BO

gaymer: OOPS IS A DISTANT SPECK IN THE WINDSHEILD

gaymer: WE ARE SOLIDLY IN OH SHIT TERRITORY AND I EXPECT U TO ACT LIKE IT

bow: uuuuuh

fidget spinner: didnt willow once say that to me?

skarapace: sounds like her when she goes off

gaymer: i-

badboi: huh

gaymer: ?

badboi: nothing but bo arent u gonna try whatever it was that boscha made

bow: oh yea peace

ededdndeddy: i cant wait for this to inevitably blow up in her face

gaymer: i hate you all

cantseeme: love ya too mittens

ededdndeddy: love ya too mittens :)

fidget spinner: love u too dumbass

skarapace: ilyt dude ;p

gaymer: …

badboi: this is what the kids call a pro gamer move amity

gaymer: …

fidget spinner: oof even luz betrayed u ami

gaymer: …

gaymer: im leaving

**[gaymer went idle]**

fidget spinner: @best girl

best girl: release the hounds

badboi: WEEEEEEE LETS GO

Panic! at the gender: wtf even

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hah sry for being gone for awhile-ish I've just been dealing with stuff
> 
> imma try to update midnight howl sometime this week but for now enjoy this last chill(?) chap before they play the midnight game


	19. Midnight p e r s o n you nitwit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> cantseeme: i would think after years of being called the midnight man it would mean that the entity is in fact going by he
> 
> fidget spinner: but what if they’re mad that everyone is calling them man so thats why they attack ppl playing
> 
> cantseeme: …

**[11:20 pm]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

fidget spinner: psss anyone awake

cantseeme: we never fucking sleep waddya want

fidget spinner: i see that someone isnt getting attention from their partner

cantseeme: @ me next time binch

fidget spinner: anygays we have forty min to start the midnight game so r yall coming

Panic! at the gender: im gonna sit this one out

smol boi: me too but have fun :D

best girl: id rather not

bow: yea nah not happening

fidget spinner: pussies

fidget spinner: except willow nd gus u two r good

fidget spinner: so am i right in assuming everyone else is in?

ededdndeddy: heel yea

cantseeme: ofc

badboi: yeee

gaymer: yes

skarapace: babe everything is set up

fidget spinner: kay nice

fidget spinner: okay guys meet me out in the lot we’re taking the mystery machine

gaymer: we dont have a mystery machine

fidget spinner: my pOINT IS

fidget spinner: we’re gonna play somewhere else so lets go

badboi: where

fidget spinner: some abandoned warehouse i found next to target

gaymer: thats

fidget spinner: gREAT LETS GO

gaymer: willow you arent going to stop her?

best girl: when uve dated boscha for as long as i have u learn that there are times when u cannot change her mind

best girl: this is one of those times

gaymer: and skara?

best girl: well

skarapace: me nd bosch r two cheeks of the same ass okay, we share one braincell

gaymer: that didnt answer my question at all

best girl: what skara meant is that what i said about boscha applies to her as well

fidget spinner: yesh

skarapace: yesh

gaymer: i see

fidget spinner: okay cmon guys im waiting

badboi: ill be down in a sec boscha

fidget spinner: oh yes its all coming together

gaymer: this cant end well

fidget spinner: shut up simp

**[12:20 pm]**

best girl: they would have started by now right

Panic! at the gender: mhm

Panic! at the gender: those idiots

bow: arent u literally datin one of those idiots

Panic! at the gender: well willow is dating two of them

bow: touche

smol boi: do you think they can contact us?

best girl: prob

bow: yea but chances that they’ll remember to use their phones is slim

smol boi: what makes you say that bo

bow: well

bow: how do i say this

Panic! at the gender: they lack certain braincells

best girl: thats one way to put it

smol boi: …

smol boi: @badboi

badboi: hey guys :D

best girl: luz!

best girl: are you all okay?

badboi: um more or less

badboi: we’ve just been walking in circles, boscha says we need to keep moving or the midnight man is gonna catch us

best girl: makes sense

best girl: can you tell boscha to get her phone out?

badboi: yea sure though skara and edric left their phone out cause they thought it was against the rules to bring electronics

fidget spinner: technically it is thats why i wasnt texting here at first

Panic! at the gender: uh then maybe u shouldnt be texting

best girl: guys?

smol boi: maybe they turned their phones off

smol boi: i mean they are at risk

bow: yea or they got shived

Panic! at the gender: bo please

bow: right right right

fidget spinner: shit okay we’re fine

fidget spinner: someone just threw a glass at amitys head cause he was flirting wituhdfigjnshb

best girl: ?

gaymer: dont worry about it

best girl: is boscha fine

gaymer: yes shes alright

gaymer: we were just a little spooked by the sudden action

Panic! at the gender: i see

Panic! at the gender: hows emira?

gaymer: so far shes attempted to catch this supposed entity as we navigate this warehouse

Panic! at the gender: ah, tell her to be careful

gaymer: mhm

fidget spinner: okay we’ll report back in an hour peace

best girl: be safe

badboi: an attempt will be made

**[1:38 am]**

fidget spinner: i think we should start calling the midnight man the midnight person

fidget spinner: we dont know what they identify as

cantseeme: i would think after years of being called the midnight man it would mean that the entity is in fact going by he

fidget spinner: but what if they’re mad that everyone is calling them man so thats why they attack ppl playing

cantseeme: …

badboi: big brain take

Panic! at the gender: oh thank god ur alright

fidget spinner: yea but we lost amity

bow: yoU WHAT

badboi: we heard singing from nearby then a tv fell infront of us and we all ran but amity got split off from the rest of us

best girl: well do you know in what direction they went?

badboi: nope but we’ve been going around in circles so we shouldnt be far from finding him :D

best girl: i appreciate your enthusiasm luz thank you

fidget spinner: okay we have about two hours left so cmon guys

best girl: gl also luz wheres ur holy water gun

badboi: well i figured it would be rude to spray water in the midnight person’s face so i left it at home

best girl: …

best girl: understandable have a nice day

badboi: plskoldmjnf

smol boi: did something happen?

fidget spinner: no that was just luz keysmashing the bi away

badboi: bold of u to assume i can do anything to scare the bi away

fidget spinner: thats the spirit nerd

**[2:59 am]**

gaymer: uh guys i can see eyes outside

badboi: aMITY YOURE OKAY

gaymer: yea i still dont know where you all are tho

gaymer: and i can see red eyes outside

fidget spinner: okay first question, do u think its the midnight person?

gaymer: undoubtedly

fidget spinner: just say yes like a normal person

fidget spinner: also second question, do they look like they wanna climb you?

gaymer: climb me?

fidget spinner: u know like

fidget spinner: they find u hot and wanna climb u like a pole

gaymer: …

gaymer: boscha this is a supernatural being why on earth would it want to “climb” me?

fidget spinner: i mean objectively speaking ur hot dude

gaymer: …

gaymer: i dont think

badboi: no

badboi: i will destroy this person myself if they so much as look at amity that way

fidget spinner: inch resting

best girl: boscha pls say interesting like a normal person

fidget spinner: inch

fidget spinner: resting

**[3:27 am]**

cantseeme: boscha stfu

fidget spinner: fuck u

cantseeme: u wish

bow: whats happenin now

cantseeme: boscha keeps singing jopping under her breath

cantseeme: im here trying not to die and all i hear is this idiot going “put your hands in the air lemme see u bounce”

fidget spinner: shut

best girl: pls tell me u found amity

fidget spinner: oh yea they’re with us

fidget spinner: luz hasnt let go of his arm and i think he’s enjoying it ;)

best girl: good for him i suppose

best girl: is skara doing alright?

fidget spinner: yep shes been watching my back

best girl: okay good, its almost done right?

fidget spinner: yea we got about five minutes left dw babe

gaymer: holy fuck guys

gaymer: look behind the kitchen door

fidget spinner: wtf

Panic! at the gender: guys what is it

badboi: uh its

badboi: well

Panic! at the gender: yes?

**[badboi, fidget spinner, gaymer and cantseeme went idle]**

bow: shit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha cliffhanger i guess idk
> 
> anyways feel free to comment and leave kudos, I appreciate them :D


	20. Yall alive in there?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ededdndeddy: at least ur not being stupid i guess
> 
> smol boi: what if global warming is just protecting us from another ice age
> 
> best girl: …

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the art in here is mine so don't use or repost without permission >:/

**[3:32 am]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

fidget spinner: wERE ALIVE

fidget spinner: HELLOOOOOOOOO

best girl: BOSCHA

best girl: BOSCHA HONEY ARE YOU ALRIGHT? HOWS SKARA? AND LUZ AND THE OTHERS WHERE ARE THEY?

fidget spinner: we’re fine dw

fidget spinner: we just saw a weird circle thing behind the door but then 3:30 hit so we done

best girl: oh thank god

fidget spinner: we’re gonna stop at target

best girl: u what

fidget spinner: shhhh we’re going to target

best girl: …

Panic! at the gender: care to explain wHY

fidget spinner: luz wanted sour patches and amity being the simp that he is just hAAAAD to get her the candy

fidget spinner: also skara wanted doritos so yea

gaymer: i hope you realize how hypocritical that sounded

fidget spinner: shut up simp

gaymer: yet again the only casualty in this ordeal was me

gaymer: outwardly i look fine but mentally ive been through war

fidget spinner: okay drama king smh

badboi: lETS GET CANDY

badboi: CMON AMITY :DD

gaymer: coming luz

skarapace: thats what she said

ededdndeddy: gotten

cantseeme: gotten

smol boi: gotten

ededdndeddy: pain

bow: bosch get me a pepsi

fidget spinner: sure thing

fidget spinner: im getting smth for u willow dw

best girl: i didnt ask

fidget spinner: why do u hurt me so babe

best girl: because i dont want you getting into trouble

fidget spinner: hmm

gaymer: luz and i got what we needed to we’re gonna walk home

fidget spinner: right right cmon skara we gotta look for stuff

**[fidget spinner and skarapace went idle]**

ededdndeddy: usually id think they’re fucking but i dont-

Panic! at the gender: we’re not going there today

Panic! at the gender: both of u r inside right?

cantseeme: i used my car so ye

cantseeme: i just wanna take a long bath and sleep for a year

Panic! at the gender: get upstairs and u can do all of those things alright

bow: right im gonna play among us peace

ededdndeddy: have fun binch

bow: i will whore

fidget spinner: we have acquired everything

fidget spinner: we are returning to the dock

best girl: be quick about it

skarapace: ofc babe

ededdndeddy: at least ur not being stupid i guess

smol boi: what if global warming is just protecting us from another ice age

best girl: …

Panic! at the gender: …

ededdndeddy: …

cantseeme: …

badboi: …

gaymer: …

skarapace: …

bow: …

fidget spinner: gUS YESBHJDKNH

smol boi: i just realized that

smol boi: but obviously there iisnt concrete evidence that that may be the case

skarapace: u scared me for a sec there little man

smol boi: im 18

skarapace: still a little man

skarapace: its a compliment

smol boi: oh, in that case thank you skara :D

fidget spinner: gonna jam to katy perry brb

best girl: what did u get from target

fidget spinner: wouldnt u like to know habibti ;)

best girl: …

best girl: i dont know what to do with that

skarapace: lmao ur gonna love it babe

best girl: ill take your word for it i suppose

fidget spinner: as u should

badboi: okay well me nd amity have a sushi date so byyyye

gaymer: djnsfhiujk

fidget spinner: date you say👀

badboi: yea so bye

best girl: at 4am

best girl: eh have fun i guess

**[4:12 am]**

**[{Disaster gays and where to find them}]**

Boscha: amity u are one lucky bastard

Amity: shudfjnsbhijkns

Boscha: smh gay ppl🙄

Edric: arent you a gay person too?

Boscha: irrelevant

Boscha: anygays amity watcha gonna do hmm😜

Amity: ndufjskh

Amity: im just going to pay for the meal then i dont know

Boscha: lame

Boscha: ur not gonna profess ur undying love to her

Amity: jkdshufialjknfdbh

Emira: stfu all of u im trying to sleep

Boscha: put ur phone on silent then u binch

Emira: maybe i will slut

Boscha: good whore

Edric: we’re getting off track

Skara: calm tf down all of you

Bo: amity do whatever u want at this date i rly dont care but if u make another story on how u have a crush on anyone besides luz and tell luz that i will kill you

Amity: …

Boscha: honestly im surprised no one is crushing on u bo

Boscha: u feisty

Bo: keep it in ur pants bosch u already have two gfs smh🙄

Boscha: u know u love it ;p

Bo: yea whatever, anyways i gtg peace

Edric: well thats a great game plan

Amity: i hate all of you

Boscha: love ya too mittens ;p

**[5:40 am]**

**[{The gays of the third floor}]**

gaymer: luz please stop

badboi: no

badboi: i cant believe u think that cereal is soup

fidget spinner: I sensed tension and came as soon as I could

best girl: boscha istg

fidget spinner: oooooo luz is mad at amity

fidget spinner: whaddya do simp

gaymer: boscha if you dont shut ur mouth i will make sure that tomorrow morning you wake up with no hair and blue teeth

fidget spinner: good i needed to wax anyways

cantseeme: bOSOCHAINDUHSFJSKN

gaymer: im gonna fucking end u

fidget spinner: try me binch

ededdndeddy: oMFKGKJDLMS BOSCHA IS THAT WHAT U GOT FROM TARGETIHUDF

fidget spinner: yes

fidget spinner: watch ur back simp im coming for u

gaymer: wait ur in the dorm

fidget spinner: yes

gaymer: ooh shit

gaymer: lzu heijkdl;dskjnkf

**[6:01 am]**

best girl: what just happened

ededdndeddy: boscha may or may not have killed amity

best girl: mhm tell her to clean the blood before coming back into bed

ededdndeddy: …

ededdndeddy: help

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao i might be in the hospital but i got three platonic gfs so whos rly winning


	21. Tall vampire lady hot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emira: hi skara welcome to the next episode of ‘will Lady Dimitrescu pay my student loans’

**[9:12 am]**

**[{disaster gays and where to find them}]**

**[Emira added Skara to {disaster gays and where to find them}]**

Boscha: this but me

Boscha: hello miss maam i heard you had applications open for ‘ill be ur sugar mommy if u let me feed on u’ and bOI HOWDY am i interested

Amity: wha

Skara: babe?

Emira: hi skara welcome to the next episode of ‘will Lady Dimitrescu pay my student loans’

Boscha: jhsduifijks

Boscha: listen shes hot okay

Skara: im not disagreeing babe

Skara: shes

Skara: pretty woman

Skara: gibt

Boscha: jnhijdofskfn

Amity: yes well i have class so bye

Boscha: oho sHIIT MY CLASS

Boscha: JAOSIDNFIHGK

Skara: RUN BABE RUN

Edric: GET THAT EDUCATION BRO

Amity: this is a mess

**[11:42 am]**

**[{The gays of the third floor}]**

cantseeme: what the fuck is what the shit

gaymer: wh-

ededdndeddy: yes emira

badboi: m hongry

fidget spinner: horny and hungry?

badboi: wha

badboi: no im hungry

fidget spinner: ah

fidget spinner: amity i know u got excited there for a min

gaymer: why on earth would i get excited

fidget spinner: 🤷🏽‍♀️

gaymer: well its lunch no? luz cmon we’re gonna go out to eat with the others

badboi: yeeee

fidget spinner: i dont remember agreeing

best girl: cmon boscha, skara

fidget spinner: yes maam

skarapace: coming willow

gaymer: …

**[1:12 pm]**

ededdndeddy: tag urself

ededdndeddy: emira trying to land a ball of paper into the bin from the fifth row during a lecture or boscha in heart shaped glasses telling the teacher to fuck off

gaymer: i thought we agreed to go oNE class without someone getting sent out

fidget spinner: lmao when did we do that?

gaymer: five minutes ago? at lunch?

fidget spinner: no u agreed to that

gaymer: I distinctly remember you being there and agreeing?

fidget spinner: i dont think so

gaymer: well i guess thats that

Panic! at the gender: well that didnt take long

Panic! at the gender: this might be a new record

ededdndeddy: all i know is that boscha is sitting in the office staring at the secretary and radiating big dick energy

skarapace: as she should

best girl: boscha dont fuck the secretary

fidget spinner: smh why would i do that when i have two amazing gfs that i could cuddle with all day 🙄

smol boi: that was almost adorable

fidget spinner: thank u kindly sir ;p

best girl: yes well boscha put your phone away and pay attention please? I dont want you to get expelled

fidget spinner: aww dw about me flowers im a good student and the only person winning the schools rugby games

fidget spinner: u too skara

fidget spinner: they’re not gonna expel me

best girl: i hope ur right babe

fidget spinner: haha hes calling me in wish me luck :p

skarapace: gl bosch

**[2:41 pm]**

smol boi: guys i just saw edric and luz hitting each other with a trash lid

gaymer: they wha?

smol boi: they’re down in the dorm taking turns smacking the lid over each others head

fidget spinner: are the bisexuals okay?

skarapace: are we ever

gaymer: i just saw viney making coffee in emira’s mouth

fidget spinner: couple goals?????

gaymer: emira would attack me before i even managed to call them that

cantseeme: dont fucking tempt me mittens

gaymer: fight me angy boy

fidget spinner: JSIODKF ANGY DUOBFSB

**[fidget spinner changed cantseeme to angy boi]**

angy boi: im giving u a five second head start bosch

fidget spinner: im about to go talk to the principal

angy boi: i dont care

fidget spinner: 🏃🏽‍♀️

fidget spinner: zoom zoom lmao

angy boi: dICKHEAD

skarapace: wait guys

skarapace: starfish have mouths in the middle of their bodies right?

smol boi: yes?

skarapace: mermaids us them as bras

smol boi: …

Panic! at the gender: …

bow: i guess they’re having fun

**[4:12 pm]**

**[{disaster gays and where to find them]}**

Boscha: guys

Boscha: pbj is a salad

Emira: im done

Boscha: nonono hear me out

Boscha: bread comes from plants jelly and jams are squashed plants therefore pbj is a salad

Skara: my gf is an idiot

Emira: bo cure her

Bo: im not a miracle worker, there is noo cure for stupidity

Amity: thats still the smartest thing boscha has ever said

Boscha: it looks like the only casualty in this ordeal is me yet again

Boscha: i mean physically im alright but mentally ive been through three divorces

Edric: okay binch

Boscha: btw amity when are u gonna ask luz out

Amity: shdiufjkn

Emira: and today’s gay panic has been brought to you by the one and only Amity “gay panic” Blight

Emira: tune in next chapter to see whether lumity becomes canon or not

Boscha: who tf are u talking to

Emira: idk

Emira: i just wanted to be a news reporter for a sec

Boscha: fair

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shorter chap cause i have hw lmao
> 
> yet again, the art is mine so don't use without permission


	22. Date or nah tho?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amity: hi wtf
> 
> Edric: fUFu GO GeT thE LioN

**[11:12 pm]**

**[{disaster gays and where to find them}]**

Boscha: gus and skara are trying to kill me

Emira: gus porter?

Emira: the sweet little boi from across the dorm

Emira: the one who baked you not one but tHREE cakes for your birthday

Boscha: yes

Emira: the same boi who did ramadan with you even tho he isnt muslim?

Emira: that boi?

Boscha: ffs yes

Boscha: i was walking outside his dorm and all i heard was “fufu go get the lion”

Edric: hELP

Amity: hi wtf

Edric: fUFu GO GeT thE LioN

Skara: watch ur step bosch

Boscha: wHAT DID I DO BABE

Skara: u ordered boneless chimken wings

Skara: now i will get the lions

Boscha: lIONS

Skara: release them

Gus: yes

Boscha: hELPLSPOKDLFML

Emira: press f to pay respects

Edric: fffff

Amity: i-

Amity: why is boscha getting killed?

Emira: literally just bc she ordered the wrong stuff

Boscha: tbh im not even goonna fight the divorce imma just sign whatever papers she puts infront of me cause i would be appalled if aNYONE ordered chicken wings wITHOUT the bones

Amity: i see

Amity: karma’s a bitch

Boscha: karma is a wonderful lady that i should rly start dating

Amity: uhun

Skara: EXCUSE ME BINCH

Skara: YOU’RE ALREADY DATING ME ND WILLOW

Boscha: oh yeah

Emira: oH YeAH

Edric: the

Amity: audacity

Edric: oop

Boscha: 😢

Skara: cry about it

**[12:00 pm]**

Skara: lmao sry bosch i got a bit dramatic

Boscha: yes

Boscha: yes u fucking did but ily so eh

Emira: how tf-

Edric: plot twist, skara is a capricorn

Boscha: wha

Boscha: so ur telling me she threatened to attack me with lions cause shes a caprisun

Emira: cAPRISUN

Emira: IM LIVING

Amity: i wish i wasnt

Emira: amity

Emira: what happened

Amity: nothing

Boscha: depression do be hittin

Amity: yep

Emira: …

Edric: …

Gus: …

Skara: oooooo mETH

Boscha: i-

Skara:  [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxAYHOWxGi8 ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxAYHOWxGi8) get into it

Boscha: drugs are bad kids

Skara: oh yes ofc

Emira: agreed

Amity: you literally smoked weed infront of me in the library last week

Emira: damn are u rly gonna mention my relapse now mittens

Amity: it wasnt a relapse thats just a normal saturday for u

Emira: hELP MITTENS FIGHTING BACK???

Amity: cry about ut

Emira: nhduisajoflkgnjk

Edric: wow

**[1:32 am]**

**[{The gays of the third floor}]**

badboi: have yall ever realized that the word imperfect spells out im perfect

Panic! at the gender: luz wh-

badboi: also therapist spells out the rapist

fidget spinner: luz

fidget spinner: i love u nerd

badboi: love ya too boscha :D

gaymer: bOSCHA

fidget spinner: smh whatever simp 🙄

gaymer: …

fidget spinner: :P

badboi: im-

cantseeme: dw about it

badboi: ?????????

best girl: boscha no

fidget spinner: fuck her r

fidget spinner: what willow?

best girl: i know what you were gonna send and im telling u not to

fidget spinner: eye c

skarapace: gay ppl 🙄

fidget spinner: okay binch

gaymer: hey luz

badboi: ye amity

gaymer: wanna be my platonic gf

badboi: sure :D

fidget spinner: …

fidget spinner: what the fuk is going on here on this day

**[skarapace changed gaymer to gayass]**

gayass: wow thanks

skarapace: no prob

badboi: wait what is a platonic gf

gayass: google says platonic love or platonic relationship is a special emotional and spiritual relationship between two people who love, admire, and are committed to one another because they share common interests, values, similar world view, a deep spiritual connection, or share similar values and interests

badboi: hmm yea id be happy to be ur platonic gf

badboi: only if u agree to be my platonic bf/partner ;)

gayass: shduifljska yesh

fidget spinner:  _ gayass _

gayass: shut

badboi: what if we😍😳k-kissed😱🤐in your dorm room😎🔥on the bed🛌😳and we were both🥵🥺platonically dating💏😘

gayass: dsnijfghkblujisankBAHILSUDFJKDFGNSSAIBFU SDJFKNOIJAKLDJOFH

fidget spinner: greetings viewers, it seems that our resident feisty bisexual, luz, has finally managed to kill amity “gayass” blight in a fit of gay panic

cantseeme: the-

ededdndeddy: gay ppl🙄

fidget spinner: okay gay person🙄

ededdndeddy: fight me pinkalicious

fidget spinner: i think tf not fucking seaweed head

skarapace: i like how we’re just ignoring amity’s death

best girl: im sure hes alright

badboi: 🥴

bow: hi wtf

fidget spinner: hellow bow

bow: hellow fidget spinner

fidget spinner: binch

bow: bitch

Panic! at the gender: can we not

bow: no

fidget spinner: no

Panic! at the gender: pain

cantseeme: who caused my partner pain

fidget spinner: me seaweed bitch

smol boi: can we not fight rn its literally 2am

cantseeme: ofc gus

fidget spinner: sure thing my boi

smol boi: thank u goodnight :D

fidget spinner: gn gus

cantseeme: gn

ededdndeddy: night

skarapace: gnight

badboi: gnight gus :D

Panic! at the gender: night gus

gaymer: good night sleep well

**[smol boi went idle]**

fidget spinner: anygays so now amity and luz are platonically dating?

skarapace: apparently????

fidget spinner: huh

fidget spinner: ig that counts

badboi: time for a change in user

fidget spinner: wha

**[badboi changed their name to puppy gf]**

**[puppy gf changed gayass to kitty bf]**

kitty bf: nsjiaokdlnfkg

bow: not more gay shit

puppy gf: yeee :D

fidget spinner: gayass

puppy gf: *clears throAT*

fidget spinner: bIASS

Panic! at the gender: why tf are u all still awake

ededdndeddy: well why r u awake then?

Panic! at the gender: …

**[Panic! at the gender went idle]**

cantseeme: bABE

**[cantseeme went idle]**

ededdndeddy: the gays are back at it again

skarapace: go ask jerbo out then u gay fuck

ededdndeddy: help

best girl: babe pls

best girl: leave him alone

skarapace: kay

**[skarapace, best girl and puppy gf went idle]**

fidget spinner: @kitty gf u good bruh?

kitty bf: yea

fidget spinner: i never expected u to ask luz out, congrats

fidget spinner: although u kind of did 50% cause u only asked her out platonically

kitty bf: hmm

kitty bf: girls pretty

fidget spinner: im well aware of that gayass

kitty bf: dont u have two gfs to take care of?

fidget spinner: bold of u to assume i taek care fo anyone blight

kitty bf: well dont you?

fidget spinner: well maybe who knows

kitty bf: i hate you

fidget spinner: yea yea love ya too dumbass🙄

kitty bf: :/

fidget spinner: 🥴

kitty bf: stop

fidget spinner: 🥵

kitty bf: boscha

fidget spinner: 😜

kitty bf: boscha istg

fidget spinner: damn okay

fidget spinner: dont attack the hottest bitch in this gc

kitty bf: funny i thought u would say ur gfs are the hottest ones here

fidget spinner: they are

fidget spinner: im just the hottest  **_bitch_ ** in this gc

kitty bf: i see

fidget spinner: 😉

kitty bf: stahp

fidget spinner: smh fiiiiiiiiine

fidget spinner: only bc im getting bored and i wanna cuddle with willow and skara

kitty bf: you??? could have???? done that??? awhile ago????

fidget spinner: h m m m m m m m m a y h a p s

kitty bf: then????? Why????????

**[fidget spinner went idle]**

kitty bf: help

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> maybe i will update midnight howl this week, who knows


	23. Amity counter attack?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Edric: my braincells assembling to think of this joke 💃🏼🕺🏼💃🏼🕺🏼💃🏼🕺🏼
> 
> Amity: bold of you to assume u even have six braincells
> 
> Edric: mITTENS PLSKDMJN

**[5:32 am]**

**[{The gays of the third floor}]**

fidget spinner: guys help i watched a serbian movie

puppy gf: which one?

fidget spinner: wDYM W H I C H ONE??? THERES ONLY OENUISDJFBH

skarapace: wait like

skarapace: the movie thats actually called a serbian movie and not a movie that was made in serbia

fidget spinner: yes

skarapace: oof

puppy gf: im gonna google it wait

kitty bf: lUZ NO

kitty bf: LUZ NO PLS DONTUIBFJ

puppy gf: oh

fidget spinner: luz pls

puppy gf: i didnt

puppy gf: i didnt think it was that

puppy gf: boscha

puppy gf: bOSCHA WHISUDJNFHB

fidget spinner: it was a dare

Panic! at the gender: do you regret it

fidget spinner: yes

Panic! at the gender: cry about

ededdndeddy: boscha why

fidget spinner: guys

fidget spinner: it was sijdofng

fidget spinner: i want to physically apply bleach to my retinas

best girl: please dont babe

best girl: we can watch lion king to help you forget okay

fidget spinner: babe

fidget spinner: i cannot unsee what i saw

fidget spinner: bABE I SAW SOMEONE GET KILLED BY A HIDJFBHUOJS

skarapace: wha

fidget spinner: i dont wanna revisit it lets just

fidget spinner: can we just watch disney movies and cuddle?

best girl: ofc boscha, anything

**[fidget spinner and best girl went idle]**

kitty bf: why is this happening at 5am

cantseeme: dw about it

ededdndeddy: wait mittens have u watched this movie

kitty bf: regrettably

kitty bf: i wouldnt recommend at all

puppy gf: the movie is sick wtf

kitty bf: twas a dare

puppy gf: you all do a lot of things for dares you know

kitty bf: mhm

kitty bf: i just want to know what we did for someone to make this movie

puppy gf: do u want cuddles too rn?

kitty bf: ndisufjhgsi

kitty bf: i have to go to the gym in a few min so maybe hold off on that

puppy gf: at 5am?

kitty bf: yea

puppy gf: ill go with you just gimme a sec to get ready

**[puppy gf went idle]**

smol boi: well that was something

kitty bf: i am not panicking

ededdndeddy: no one said u were

kitty bf: oh

ededdndeddy: which prob means u are so

kitty bf: nO

ededdndeddy: sus

cantseeme: sus

Panic! at the gender: go tf to sleep children

kitty bf: ur literally two years older than me

Panic! at the gender: still

kitty bf: i-

**[Panic! at the gender went idle]**

ededdndeddy: well gl mittens

ededdndeddy: and if u start drooling at luz just dont

kitty bf: i???? wont????? do???? that??????

cantseeme: sure anygays gl

kitty bf: wait

**[ededdndeddy and cantseeme went idle]**

kitty bf: im-

bow: well this was a bust

kitty bf: bo wh-

bow: yes am?

kitty bf: nothing its fine

kitty bf: i thnk my crush on luz may be becoming extremely apparent

bow: luz can literally backread and see this but okay

kitty bf: oH SHIT

**[bow deleted one(1) message from kitty bf]**

bow: istg im the only one with a functioning braincell around here

kitty bf: thanks bo

bow: yea yea go get ready for ur gym date with luz u gay disaster

kitty bf: hsudifjklg okie

**[8:12 am]**

**[{disaster gays and where to find them}]**

Edric: guys

Edric: have yall realized that viney has no biney

Boscha: wha

Skara: wh-

Skara: ooooooh

Skara: cause they’re non binary

Boscha: ooooOOOOOO

Emira: we’re all so dumb why did it take us so lonog to figure that out

Emira: wHY DID EDRIC OF ALL PPL THINK OF THAT JOKE FIRST?

Edric: my braincells assembling to think of this joke 💃🏼🕺🏼💃🏼🕺🏼💃🏼🕺🏼

Amity: bold of you to assume u even have six braincells

Edric: mITTENS PLSKDMJN

Amity: cry about it

Edric: i will 😿

Amity: okay furry

Edric: HELPOKLJSNDKFMG

Emira: jASON DERULOOOOO

Boscha: stop this instant

Gus: becky g is really pretty guys

Boscha: i-

Boscha: ive never seen say that about any girl help

Boscha: i thought u were gay bro

Gus: i am but even i can acknowledge how pretty women are

Boscha: huh

Boscha: well i personally think tove lo looks hotter but sure

Amity: shes literally over ten years older than you

Boscha: okay but u simped for a fucking lion in a childrens show so u have no room to judge me

Emira: oh yea the nala thing

Amity: sTOP I WAS A CHILD

Boscha: so ur not denying that u had the hots for nala

Amity: BOSCHA NO

Boscha: my poker face my my poker face

Amity: BOSCHA ISTG

Boscha: lady gaga is also pretty hot ngl

Skara: can we not change the subject this fast im getting whiplash

Skara: also might i add lauren jauregui

Edric: yES

Edric: HER YESUHJDSNBFHGJKN

Skara: i-

Emira: oh yea shes rly pretty

**[Amity changed the chat name to {simping in progress please hold}]**

Boscha: the audacity

Amity: got a complaint? file it in with my agent

Skara: plot twist luz is the agent

Amity: nBJHUIDSJKFB

Boscha: noot amity having an affair with their agent

Amity: iM NOTIFJDKH

Emira: wait but normani

Skara: nono ur right

Gus: nicky minaj

Boscha: gus knows who nicky minaj is

Gus: yes? also bebe rexha

Skara: my boi cultured

Amity: britney spears

Emira: not amity naming a blonde

Amity: is there???? an issue???? with that????

Emira: i mean ur right cause britney in the toxic video was >>>>>>

Boscha: we’re simping too much

Skara: so tru us

Boscha: thats a negative skara

Skara: babe 

Skara: are u disagreeing with me

Boscha: yes????

Skara: ra ra ah ahah roma roma ma gaga oh la la want your bad romance

Boscha: okay drama queen

Skara: rARA AH AHA HJSJDKLFN

Boscha: i-

Emira: congrats u broke ur gf

Boscha: im-

Edric: the

Boscha: help

Amity: no help for u simp

Boscha: aMITY NOISDUFJGH

Gus: oh wow

Gus: how the turntables

Boscha: wHY IS EVERYONE BETRAYING ME MERCY

Amity: no mercy for u gayass

Boscha: biNCHABSIDUJFKNG

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> srsly tho, dont watch a serbian film i was dared to watch it and I regret so much
> 
> anygays feel free to feed me with kudos and comments :D


	24. Is anyone okay here?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emira: dw we have blueprints, powerpoint presentations and plans and everything
> 
> Amity: i never asked for your help

**[1:23 am]**

**[{simping in progress please hold}]**

Boscha: oooOOOOOOH BABY

Boscha: WHY DO YOU HURT ME SOOOO

Bo: stfu drama queen im trying to sleep

Boscha: end me

Amity: whats happening

Bo: boscha being annoying

Amity: nothing new, call me if she does something out of character

Boscha: WIDE AWAKE BUT COMATOEOOSIJKDJSNFHG

Gus: i dont think shes okay

Emira: to be fair when is she okay

Boscha: okay first of all

Boscha: fuck u

Boscha: second of all

Boscha: idk where i was going with this

Amity: nothing new

Boscha: literally fuck off

Skara: boscha just slep

Boscha: no

Skara: cry about it then cause im sleeping gn

Boscha: pain

**[5:23 am]**

**[{The gays of the third floor}]**

ededdndeddy: yo who tf ate my cake

cantseeme: does it matter

ededdndeddy: yes, yes it fucking does

fidget spinner: jerbo did

ededdndeddy: did he like it?

fidget spinner: …

skarapace: thats love binch

best girl: why are u all awake so early, also how did jerbo take edrics cake this early in the morning

ededdndeddy: magic

Panic! at the gender: i absolutly hate it here

cantseeme: aww u dont mean that babe

Panic! at the gender: maybe i do

cantseeme: babe 🥺

Panic! at the gender: ur lucky ur cute

fidget spinner: wtf is happening

skarapace: r u rly still asking urself that

fidget spinner: shut up and cuddle me

fidget spinner: that includes u willow @best girl

best girl: yes well id like to sleep and im well aware that if i go with you two there will be no sleeping happening

smol boi: why not

fidget spinner: dw about it gusy boi

kitty bf: i didnt need that visual

fidget spinner: literally no one said anything

fidget spinner: if u pictured smth thats on u mittens

kitty bf: i absolutly hate it here

puppy gf: aww cmon amity

kitty bf: whatever

best girl: this is a train wreck

ededdndeddy: so is ur relationship

fidget spinner: we make train wrecks work for us

skarapace: we make train wrecks work for us

fiidget spinner: eyyyy

skarapace: eyyyy

best girl: why am i dating these idiots

skarapace: cause u looooove us

best girl: biggest mistake of my life

best girl: i regret nothing

fidget spinner: yeeeee

cantseeme: this is disgustingly sweet

puppy gf: i think its cute

bow: course u do

fidget spinner: bO

bow: yes that is my name boscha

fidget spinner: sup bro

bow: sup, i just got done ritually killing a cishet to the pizza gods so that we can have pizza for lunch today nd now im just chilling now

best girl: boscha, thats your best friend

fidget spinner: i know

bow: ;p

best girl: this is a mess

ededdndeddy: are we even surprised at this point

best girl: no i just wanted everyone to know that im not mad just disappointed

skarapace: pain

**[12:43 am]**

**[{simping in progress please hold}]**

Amity: this is a mess

Boscha: not my fault it landed on that assholes head

Amity: you very clearly aIMED THAT CAPRISUN AT HIS HEAD BOSCHA WWYGSUDHJBF

Boscha: in my defense

Boscha: i was feeling hungry

Amity: …

Amity: what kind of fucking excuse is that

Boscha: i just wanted to cause chaos okay

Edric: yo bosch

Edric: that throw was 11/10 nice going

Boscha: i try my best

Amity: im leaving

Boscha: bye binch

Gus: just would like to inform you all that the cafeteria has pizza

Bo: my ritual worked

Emira: thank u bo for ur actions

Bo: no prob

Gus: there isnt a line yet

Boscha: be there in a sec

Edric: cmon men we need to get all the pizza before it finishes

Skara: lezzgo

Emira: right behind ya chief

Bo: onwards

Amity: i wish they could put this much effort in their school work

Skara: well do u want pizza or not simp

Amity: omw

**[2:23 pm]**

**[{The gays of the third floor}]**

fidget spinner: who wants pizza bitches

ededdndeddy: we stole four boxes so lets feast

puppy gf: noice noice come to my dorm i have the tv ready too

kitty bf: but our classes

puppy gf: cmon amity i have all the star wars movies here

fidget spinner: we’re not watching the sequel trilogy

fidget spinner: and that is final

puppy gf: b-but rey and finn and poe

fidget spinner: im so glad u didnt name kylo ren cause or else id have to drop kick u

puppy gf: i would never

kitty bf: is he the preachy cry baby

puppy gf: yes

fidget spinner: we’re watching the prequel trilogy then the original then we’re just gonna play minecraft. Yall good with that plan?

ededdndeddy: anyone who wants to object say “i”

fidget spinner: cool no one, lets go team

**[5:12 pm]**

**[{simping in progress please hold}]**

Amity: guys

Amity: ive thought long and hard

Boscha: thats what he said

Amity: ...moving on

Amity: i want to ask luz out

Boscha: arent yall platonically dating

Amity: no i mean i want to ask her out romantically

Boscha: iTS TIME GUYS

Edric: MITTENS FINALLY

Skara: WOOOOOOOOO

Gus: aww nice amity

Emira: dw we have blueprints, powerpoint presentations and plans and everything

Amity: i never asked for your help

Emira: shut up and take it

**[Boscha changed the chat name to {operation lumity}]**

Boscha: operation lumity is a go men

Emira: roger that

Bo: copy that

Edric: ready commander

Skara: all clear

Amity: i hate all of you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kay so first of all, a line in this fic lowkey outed who my crush was to said crush so that's that
> 
> and second of all ya boi got a gf so u know what that means, operation lumity is a go


	25. Prison wine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Boscha: anyone got any idea on how amity is gonna propose
> 
> Amity: im not proposing?

**[9:23 pm]**

**[{opeeration lumity}]**

Boscha: okay so

Boscha: got any plans to ask luz out

Amity: yes?

Amity: im just going to walk up to her and ask her on a date

Boscha: oh no honey u cant do that

Amity: why not

Boscha: u nd luz need some ✨ _ D R A M A✨ _

Amity: i dont think

Boscha: no no no see u nd luz need a whole confession thing that consists of five marriages four breakups two murders and three possible POIs

Amity: boscha why are u describing ur relationship with willow and skara

Boscha: oh u little binch

Amity: am i wrong

Skara: i mean

Skara: i cant disagree

Amity: boom

Boscha: listen do u want our help or not

Amity: i never asked for your help if im being honest

Boscha: u ungrateful simp

Emira: can u not

Edric: shhh this is entertaining

Amity: im glad my pain is entertaining to you

Edric: ofc mittens

Boscha: moving on

Boscha: anyone got any idea on how amity is gonna propose

Amity: im not proposing?

Amity: its too early for that

Boscha: so ur planning on proposing eventually

Amity: …

Amity: thats besides the point

Boscha: u sure about that simp?

Amity: dont u have like two girlfriends to take care of

Boscha: listen

Skara: no hes right get over here

Boscha: okie

Edric: …

Emira: …

Gus: hello everyone :D

Gus: shouldnt you all be going to bed

Emira: that’s his way of telling us to shut up and go to sleep

Gus: i just want all of you to be rested enough for tomorrow since we have all of our mid-year exams

Edric: our wHAT

Boscha: WAIT WHAT

Amity: you’re all idiots

Boscha: SHUT UP SIMP

Amity: :/

Emira: yea fuck that im pulling an all nighter to study peace

Boscha: im joinin u wait

Edric: same

Amity: you arent joining them skara

Skara: i actually studied so im gonna go sleep

Boscha: ive been forsaken

Skara: gl babe nd gnight

Boscha: gnight ska ska

Edric: i cant with that nickname

Boscha: fuck off

**[Boscha went idle]**

Edric: i-

Skara: thats my gf

Edric: pain

**[7:23 am]**

**[{the gays of the third floor}]**

puppy gf: goooood morning

puppy gf: whos ready for their mid term exams cause i sure aint :’)

kitty bf: i can help u study more if u want

puppy gf: yES PLS AMI

fidget spinner: wow so we’re starting this day off gayer than ever huh

kitty bf: shut up

skarapace: ur one to talk babe

fidget spinner: pls dont turn against me

skarapace: maybe if u didnt eat my food i wouldnt be turning against u

fidget spinner: pain

ededdndeddy: can we not

cantseeme: haha binch

fidget spinner: keep laughing and ill change ur user back to angy boi bitch

puppy gf: guys can we make prison wine

Panic! at the gender: prison what

fidget spinner: wait i wanna do it to, nerd give me the ingredients

puppy gf: get fruit cocktail

fidget spinner: gottit

puppy gf: 6 peeled oranges

fidget spinner: yes

puppy gf: 60 sugar cubes

fidget spinner: simp where are the sugar cubes

kitty bf: in the cabinet over the oven

fidget spinner: kk wat next

puppy gf: ketchup

fidget spinner: kay

best girl: is no one gonna question why this is happening

cantseeme: i cant say much cause im following along too

ededdndeddy: same

best girl: ffs

puppy gf: a piece of bread then u mash everything up

fidget spinner: goTIT

kitty bf: i hate it here

ededdndeddy: shut up, then what luz

puppy gf: then u store it in a cool dark place for like maybe a week or two

puppy gf: so it can get fermented

fidget spinner: noice noice

cantseeme: fUNFUNFUNFUNFUIJNDIK

ededdndeddy: g

fidget spinner: a

kitty bf: m

best girl: y

puppy gf: e

ededdndeddy: …

ededdndeddy: im leaving

skarapace: yo guys theres a place in wales called llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

fidget spinner: babe wh-

skarapace: llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

best girl: llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

ededdndeddy: llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

cantseeme: llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

puppy gf: llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

smol booi: llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

Panic! at the gender: llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

kitty bf: why

fidget spinner: yea why

kitty bf: llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

fidget spinner: mITTENS SNOIOSDUFJGK

kitty bf: wait dont we still have class today

cantseeme: prof johnson can literally suck my entire ass

cantseeme: sure they’re hot but they need to stop assigning us essays

Panic! at the gender: i gotta agree with emira

ededdndeddy: its the teacher/student relationship for me

fidget spinner: lets not

kitty bf: wow even boscha has limits

fidget spinner: my guy teacher/student non-platonic relationships are highkey predatory and im not with that

kitty bf: so u do have a conscience

fidget spinner: smth okay simp

smol boi: guys class started you’re gonna be late

fidget spinner: gOTTA GO FAST BINCH

puppy gf: RUN BINCH RUN

kitty bf: why does this always end like this

bo: stfu and run simp

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes there is such a thing as prison wine
> 
> the only reason I know about it is bc of the one and only ally hills


End file.
